SMAD. An Organ of Student Opinion. 1937. Volume 8. Number 5.
"Oh we thought we'd like to Have Some Fun!" — Shikatoria! Hic!
"Oh we thought we'd like to Have Some Fun!"
It was a great tournament! That remark is heard every year, but the Canta tournament really was a great tournament, a tournament that will live in the memories of those who . . . etc., etc. It was doubly gratifying to all good Wikitorians. Not only did our tournament team put up a good performance, but also the lads and lasses from up the hill showed Christchurch what a 'varsity spirit should really be. The "Canta" Kaka Party was satisfactory, but Wikitoria made its efforts appear futile and halfhearted. Tournament was just another example of the enthusiasm and co-operation existing at V.U.C. this season. Keep it up, Wikitoria!!!
Easter Saturday afternoon was V.U.C.'s afternoon out. Our readers have possibly heard that the Wikitria eight won the boat race, but they have probably not heard that V.U.C. was Public Entertainer No. 1. The Canta Haka Party fell down on its job—its members were too busy drinking beer. So were Wikitorians, but not so busy to forget their duty to the Christchurch public. Songs, hakas, ceremonies! And did the public like it.? With our customary modesty we shall content ourselves by saying that the public was favourably impressed. As the eight entered the sacred waters of the Waimakariri, Archbishop Aimers blessed it and spake thus: "May Fate pour down its blessings upon you, and give you speed." The prayer was not in vain. The boats were approaching the finishing point . . . a crew in dark singlets in the lead . . . Auckland winning . . . dark blue . . . no . . . yes . . . isn't it Green ? . . . no . . . yes . . . Green! . . . Green!! . . . Green!!! At this stake V.U.C. supporters either waded into the Waimak., or were cut off by the rising tide . . . wet feet . . . who the hell cares ? And so to the nearest alehouse.
Basketball and Boxing.
Our Basketball girls modestly tell us that the V.U.C. supporters won the shield—but that is entirely erroneous. They merely did their part and they enjoyed doing it for, if ever a team was worth losing a voice about, that team was the V.U.C. B.B. team. When victory was snatched from Auckland by Janet 's last minute goal it was the signal for a wild dance of triumph up and down the courts, but the greatest moment all came at the end of the final game when every Wikitorian joined in a shouting ring encircling our nine heroines and giving them the cheers they deserved.
At the Boxing V.U.C. were again to the fore and a spontaneous burst of applause broke out at the conclusion of our first haka. Our men had the good sense to refrain from demonstrating during a bout (boxing, not drinking).
Yes—the rowing, the basketball, and the boxing were our big occasions, and to have out-haka'd the home college is a feat that even veterans of tournament cannot remember.
O! Victoria, O! Shame on thee that thou shouldst lose with such abandon the Drinking Horn! It was the only regrettable feature of tournament. V.U.C. did not field its strongest team, and this statement is born out by the fact that later in the morning a V.U.C. team defeated the winners! Unfortunately, some of our most eligible drinkers were unable to reach the bar at the hour appointed, but nevertheless the situation calls for a thorough investigation. "Smad" recommends that the team be selected in the first week of the Session, and be forced to undergo a period of serious training. "Smad" also considers that this Important event should be officially recognised, and that participants should be awarded half blues for their prowess. It may be mentioned that at the Ball, Jack Ilott was awarded the wooden spoon for drinking (speed only!!).
Canterbury must be congratulated for the success of the Tournament Ball. Held in the Winter Gardens until 1 p.m., and then at Frascatis until 5 a.m., it provided a fitting climax to a successful tournament. There was the usual wait for supper, but it was well worth waiting for. Among the enjoyable features were a Cloak Room scrum (gents only) and an interesting game of bootlegging (N.B.—In Christchurch you are not allowed to leave a dance hall once you have entered—or rather, you cannot get back again if you do). It is rumoured that Mr. Lindsay Black obtained some very interesting flash-light photos at Frascatis. It is further rumoured that several people are willing to pay a considerable sum for the negatives.
H. R. C. Wild.—Lowered the dignity of his office by running round the decks of the Rangatira clad in his underpants. The cad! Lost his coat and his reputation.
R. W. Edgley... ?... ?... !! The Cad!
J. N. Sellers.—At tournament but not of it. The cad.
Bert Fussell.—The fair-haired boy with the blue eyes. Just one accident after another. First a little trouble with a bicycle necessitating four stitches, then a graceful fall from the first storey of C.U.C. onto the green grass below. Little damage reported. The cad!
Jack Ilott.—Put to bed three times on the night of the swimming. But the spirit of the Ilotts never dies. Adjusted matter by not going to bed after Tournie Ball breakfasted and lunched in dinner jacket, and in between visited his alma mater. The cad!
Bill Young (Canta).—Fair pop, boy! Fair pop! Have a bottle of beer (repeat six times). Left his car running through tournie to save starting it. The best of them all. Fair pop, boy! Fair pop! The cad!
J. C. White.—Chief anxiety. Edgley. The cad!
J. B. Aimers.—Officially seen at Akaroa after tournie (accompanied by Agar), taking a rest cure and regaining his voice. Spoilt it all when he got back to Christchurch. The cad.
R. S. V. Simpson.—Full of ideas at the first N.Z.U.S.A. meeting, but attended thereafter only to make eyes at the "Press" reporter. The cad!
Our delegates were by way of being an ideal combination. John's efficient of everything meant that all arrangements were perfect for the V.U.C. party, while we hear that his experience made him a valued member of the Tournament Committee. Bob's work on the social side made him known by every man and feared by every woman, but he did his job on the business side, too; and we have both of them to thank for the late nights of preparation before we left Wellington.
We think the Executive should make an official statement as to the number of its members who attended functions at Ass. Purchase's house, and what happened to them there. Also, were they acting officially, those two who took over the duties of temporary barmen at the Royal on Monday?
Wikitoria did more than her whack on the social side of tournament, and at every function was to be seen and heard H.M. (Model T) "Shikatoria" piloted by Oilers Agar. Aimers, Christensen, Fussell and Gerrard. "Shika" and her keg "Public Sweetheart No. 1" provided entertainment and refreshments for anyone who merited their attention. The occupants of "Shikatoria" composed the catch-cry of tournament:
Shikatoria, Hic! Skikatoria, Hic! Bottle oh! Bottle Oh! Shikatoria.
Shikatoria was indeed the bung of the tournament, the hand which raised the handle.
New Speakers' Debate
Perhaps it may have been due to the ladies. You know, of course, that women are better suited to care for children than men. So perhaps the cradle for would-be speakers is better in the hands of the female of the species.
But whatever the cause the new speaker's debate on "That the progress of Science has not been in the best interests of the community" was an improvement on previous new speakers. Miss Nan McGhie was "Madame Chairman." Miss Margaret Shortall was the judge.
Plenty of speakers. Plenty of an audience. Plenty of interjections—quite witty some of them.
Allowing, of course, for the fact that it was a new speaker's debate.
Miss Moir and Mr. Saunders moved the motion.
Mass Justine Smith and Mr. Treadwell opposed.
As could be expected, those for the motion had a very hard case to prove, while their opponents had not.
The case against science was conducted along classical lines. The argument of poison gas, machines of destruction, etc., which are the fruit of perverted knowledge.
And again, that all these labour-saving devices and all that are making mollycoddles of us. It would be much better for us if we had to walk up to lectures instead of taking the cable car.
The pro-scientists merely had to emphasise the progress of modern medicine among other things to prove their case. Mr. Treadwell maintained that only through science was intellectual matter such as is found in "Smad," brought to us. Social wit—Don't hold that against science.
He summarised the progress of science as from quill to fountain pen, from wheelbarrow to tractor.
Mr. Spiller evidently must not read the notice board, for he confessed that he was unaware there was a debate until quite late. He used the argumentum ad hominem, appeal to the baser instincts of the mob: "If it was not for science you wouldn't be having a debate—at least not in this room—around a camp fire I suppose.
He also made effective use of the liberation of man from the grinding struggle for existence—with the consequent opportunities for intellectual and cultural development.
Don got so warmed up that he had to be shut up. of providing cheap luxuries form—
Mechanical inventions as a meansed a large part of Mr. Foley's discourse.
"Take the typewriter. It has done a lot of good. Amongst other things it has raised the marriage age."
Miss Barbara Thompson treated the motion zoologically. If an organism is to survive, it must use to the full its powers of development.
Mr. Winter treated us with cold logic. Man realises the horror of war. Therefore, they proved themselves from agression, thus causing further strife. A vicious circle.
Mr. O'Reilly stated the progress of science will manifest itself through the abolition of war.
The judge, Miss Shortall, gave some hints to speakers about the use of the eye. The glad eye ? No! The use of the eye in quelling an audience.
She placed the speakers in this order: Mr. Treadwell, Miss Justine Smith, Mr. Saunders, Mr. Murphy, Mr. O'Reilly.
The motion was lost.
Weir House Dance.
Weir House staged a dance on Wednesday night, April 24th. Everything was done in the traditional style. A good orchestra, gay crowd, delicious supper—not a bad show at all. Dress informal. Anybody with a tin front was taken out and shot. When you became tired of dancing you tripped along to a spot out of range of the orchestra. There would be found a radio set humming out a rhythmic ragtime. That's the story of . . . That's the glory of .. Jove . . . I sailed away . . .
Just think of the harmony and peace with such a psychological background. The music issued ultimately from a transmitting station installed in one of the rooms, whence a land wire travelled to the various radios.
Needless to say all the records were carefully chosen by psychological experts with a view to the atmosphere that should pervade a social gathering of the young of both sexes.
Of course, there was no Commissionaire present.
Down by the moss and the rustling sedge,
With the dew-bright morning scare begun.
She grew on the water's trembling edge,
With her petals flattened against the sun.
And her life's great urge strove sunward there
As she swayed alone in the sweet still air.
The human heart is a flower that blows
By a silent lake's unsounded floor;
And the anxious world is a oream that goes
On the wind that wanders the trackless shore.
For the senseless heart and the flower are one
As they strive, unknowingly, towards the sun.
—I. R. M.