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SMAD. An Organ of Student Opinion. 1935. Volume 6. Number 3.

Old Men Totter Out

Old Men Totter Out.

With the approach of the 1935 University Session came the important annual function of ejecting the Undesirables from Weir that more and yet more babes in swaddling clothes might be admitted to the pseudo-Plunket Institution. The calls succeeded in squeezing a final free supper out of the institution, and then hastily departed in confusion, worse confounded, and the remaining residents consisting firstly of a few students enabled to stay by reason of intellectual inability to graduate in a mere six or seven years: secondly, of a few definitely Undesirables, who had nevertheless kept within the four corners of the eligibility rules, and, finally, mere puppets of one or two years standing, sat back to await the arrival of the new boys. And what boys Short boys, tall boys, thin boys, fat boys, fair boys, dark boys, ugly boys, handsome boys, dull boys, clever boys—all came pouring into the institution amid a chorus of shrill piping voices. At the first House meeting the Warden effusively welcomed these kiddies, congratulated them on their pleasant, rosy, dimpled faces, as yet untouched by cold steel, and expressed the fond wish that none of them would incur dismissal by committing either of the Two Deadly Sins, namely, Banging Doors, and Smoking. When the necessary new rules are gazetted which will provide, inter alia, for bedtime at 9 p.m. compulsory hot water bottles, napkins, etc, we shall let our readers know.