Chemistry Complains.

Our Friday afternoon Chemistry lecture has now twice been violated in a manner that beggars all description Let me whisper in your ear.

Sir, the seat of the trouble is the Biology Laboratory and the Lingering and offensive smells capable of emanating from that chamber of horrors.

As is my wont each Friday afternoon, I arrived at the Chemistry Lecture room at 4 p.m. No sooner Avas I seated than wave upon wave of a nauseous vapour assailed my nostrils. It was that most deadly and excruciatingly malignant horror—D.O. (Even their best friends wont tell them).

You, in your innocence, may not know what I mean by D.O., but I assure you that if you were to sit through a lecture with any of "Biology's Blunders" after they had been at work upstairs, you would soon realise how preposterously we are being treated.

As you have doubtlessly realised by now, D.O. means "Dogfish Odour." Now, not only does the intense odour of decaying dogfish escape from the Biology Lab., and cascade down the stairs to the lower depths which are the Chemistry Lecture room, but also it becomes impregnated in the clothing of all those students, who, through blatant carelessness and lack of thought, have embarked on a course in Biology.

I have a few ideas which may prove of use in the campaign which you will undoubtedly lead against these miserable nitwits and their fish (although one can't blame the fish).

My ideas:—

(1) Each morning and each evening it should be the duty of the Lab. assistant to bathe each and every Dogfish on the premises with "Lifebuoy" soap (also any stray students found wandering about with a fishy look in their eyes).

(2) The Biology Class should be provided with a "Disrobing and Shower Room." They (all Biology students) should enter this room, disrobe, cut up the Dogfish in the nude (students as well as fish), retire to the shower room, ablute very thoroughly, re-robe, and then advance on the Chemistry Lecture room, where they will then undoubtedly be received like human beings and not, as at present, like any outcast pariahs.