How Bare?

Zoo Class Exposed

"Can any respectably-minded person justify the sight of a naked gentleman, clad in a furry bath towel rampant over a sheik couchant? To my mind this suggests nothing short of a piece of nudist propaganda, coupled with an incitement for innocent young things to make their first acquaintance with vicious newspaper writers at an Ominously 'Orrible Oriental Orgy," writes " Sanitas," in Canta.

But, alas, this bestial scourge of nudism is threatening our own Alma Mater (figuratively, of course). It may come as a shock to the delicate-minded among us to learn that in the zoology classes animals of both sexes, without clothes, are examined under the microscopes by students of both sexes (presumably with clothes on). Surely we must study this scabrous upheaval of latent demoralisation and induce an S.C.M. working bee to make clothes for the relevant parts of the animals concerned. What impresses us most is not so much the blatant indecency with which this class swaggers abroad beneath its load of putrescence, as the cynical immorality with which it revels in its abhorrent activities.

And then there are the feelings of the animals to consider. How they writhe with chaste modesty at the callous brutality of an inquisitive mortal (of the opposite sex).

A "Smad" representative tactfully sidled up to a prominent zoologician and asked him to explain the grossness, the unparalled enormity, the apalling fetor of his work.

He smiled and offered us a look at his best exhibit. Hurriedly we declined; and we learned that this class is already full—the devil take it!