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SMAD. An Organ of Student Opinion. 1932. Volume 3. Number 2.

Nude Guard

Nude Guard.

The wharf episode was a capital rag. First appeared the Nude Guard, led by Doug. Burns as Captain Big Root, and Sergeant-Major Ike Williams. The Nude Guard, a heterogenous conglomeration of Boy Scouts, Highlanders and Soldiers, were heralded by an appalling collection of would-be musicians. The Guard, formed with anything but military precision, were not a bit disconcerted when one lone policeman drove the whole imposing army away from their chosen position to another spot on the wharf. When the strains of hakas became more distinct from the Rangatira, the Guard presented arms and exploded into song. At about this time the wharf was invaded by a horde of "Maoris," sketchily clad in sack-cloth and bedaubed with ochre.

Press photographers fought each other for pride of place, and "the Maoris,' led by Whitcombe, pranced up and down and regaled Wellington Harbour dwellers and passengers on the Rangatira with a series of deuced tine renderings of the new haka. The bitterly cold morning could not daunt hakaites who pranced around amid would-be billeters and billetees and distributors of "lucky packets," chairing Charlie Plank and embracing blushing damsels. Later, at Thorndon Station, proceedings were repeated for the edification of the A.U.C. representatives. Congratters to the Haeremai Club on the best organised hooley for years!

Meantime, after a hectic drive, Charlie Plank and portion of the Tournament Ball Committee, landed at Paekakariki by car a bare two minutes before the Auckland Express arrived. "Lucky Packets" were efficiently distributed on the train. Tournament Ball chits were garnered in.