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Cricket Club—Annual Tour

Although we are handicapped this year by the absence of our Official Historian, the 1930 Xmas tour was so successful—even so far as the cricket was concerned—that it must be given a place in College history.

The tour was enjoyed the more because we had two cars at our disposal—at least one motor car and one superear—the latter being a 1914 "Mandslay" kindly lent for the expedition by Mr Stanton Harcourt. Piloted by Commodore Kirkcaldie and manned by a godless crew of stokers and greasers under Chief-Artifleer Greig, to wit: Capt. Bailey (derated), Greasers Dormer and Williams (underrated), and Acting-Steward Paetz (usually belated), "Maud" surmounted all obstacles placed in her way including Paekak. and the Commodore's hat. The team was completed by Osborns R. and H. W., E. Tindill, J. Macdonald and Carey.

The first match—against Manawatu—commenced on Xmas Day at Palmerston. After a narrow lead on the first innings secured by the steady batting of Dormer and R. Osborn we managed to win by 5 wickets, thanks to a brilliant innings by Paetz.

The scoring was as follows:—

Manawatu 142 (Greig 4—26) and 176 (Macdonald 4—28, Williams 3—28), V.U.C. 170 (Macdonald 30, Dormer 24. Bailey 23) and 151 for 5 wickets (Paetz 75, Bailey 31).

The complaints lodged by the local inn-keeper against our rendering of Xmas carols at 7 a.m. led to the jettison of Denis—better known as the boy soprano. Macdonald remained to keep him company at Palmerston, where they amused themselves sending collect telegrams to Jasper McJasper.

P. D. Wilson joined us and Stace was eleventh man for the Wanganui game. We allowed the local team to pant in the field for a day while we put together 325. Osborn H. W. surprised the punters by notching 124 and paid a handsome divvy on the team's tote (to himself—being the only ticket-holder). Wanganui were forced to follow on and finally we were left with 102 runs to make in half an hour. To make a game of it we decided to attempt the impossible, but time was called when we had reached 87 for the loss of 8 wickets.

As the captain had now been badly bitten with wanderlust and babbled continually of Lycidas when in his cups, we set sail next day for Hawera, with the gurgle of Bombay ducks in our ears and a box of George Spriggens' best cigars under the Manager's arm (bucksheesh). It is reported that the presentation cheroot which was seen going into Bailey's pocket has not been smoked at the time of going to press.

E. T. Leys joined the team at Hawera and was presented with the freedom of the city. The match against a rather weakened S. Taranaki team commenced next day and our innings realised 317. The local side was riddled with the accurate shoting of Greig and Leys. Some of the reserve bowlers were then aired (no names by request) and their second innings proved more fruitful though we secured an innings victory.

Detailed scores are:—

V.U.C. 317 (Leys 78, Paetz 68, Tindill 56, Wilson 32, Dormer 22). S. Taranaki 46 (Greig 5—23, Leys 4—18) and 176 (Leys 3—7. Dormer 3—19).

The party as a whole weathered New Year's Eve with aludable sobriety. The Hawera pipe band met with some spirited Opposition and the townsfolk enjoyed a feast of harmony. Only the efficient lubrication system evolved by some members of the team prevented serious distortion of the larynx.

Events then became shrouded in convenient obscurity until 1931 had been well started on its way. Civil War was then declared by some revellers wishing to re-enter the village inn. Presenting a tableau very vivant entitled "The Heights of Abraham" the scaling party advanced under a barrage of fish and chips, but were repulsed by a heavy downpour from an upper storey. In the general retreat which followed Kirk found that the hardness of bituminous footpaths varies in direct proportion to the height from which one jumps. An hour or more after peace was declared the belated B—rn—e turned up and explained his early arrival by the appearance of her mother en negligee (French) warning him off the premises.

We proceeded to New Plymouth, the last port of call, anticipating the most strenuous match of the tour. Again, however, we won by over an innings. The local press considered the Taranaki team stronger than the one which had beet narrowly defeated by Waikato—the present Hawke Cup holders.

The scores were:—

V.U.C. 326 (Leys 92, Bailey 55, Ivirkcaldie 39, H. Osborn 31, Wilson 26). N. Taranaki 155 (Dormer 4—20, Greig 4—26) and 105 (Leys 6—21, Dormer 2-40).

The annual boat race was contested on Pukekura Lake after the match—R. Osborn, Williams and Paetz being too strong for H. Osborn, Tindill, Wilson and Dormer. Other items of interest noted here— apart from handles of port and liverish barmen— were Hughie's liking for cabriolet models (dickey seat preferred) and Acting-Steward Paetz' generosity with strawberries and cream (kindly supplied by the management of the Ritz).

The next day—Sunday—sow the fleet head for home. The Osborn's car made the trip in one day, while the flagship paused at Wanganui for the night. Having assured ourselves that the Indian geese we had left there were in good condition we made a good passage to Wellington despite the heavy seas on the Foxton road.