The Futility of Latin Prose

In response to the urgent solicitations of a large circle of admiring friends, and in deference to the thousands of testimonials received from grateful professors, teachers, and scholars all over the country, I have consented to publish a few further hints on successful translation. Dozens of (till now) hard-wrought men and women have come to me with what can only be tears of gratitude in their eyes assuring me that "they have never seen anything like it." After much profound thought on the subject, therefore, I have reached one or two conclusions, from which, I sincerely trust, the breathless masses of waiting students can derive nought but benefit.

I might say that I have lately become fully convinced of the futility of the present method employed by teachers of setting difficult proses which can be turned into Latin only after hours of severe mental anguish, and by dint of absurdly formal constructions and complex idioms. Indeed, the very ambiguity of page 3 many of the set pieces has frequently flung even me, torn between conflicting possibilities, on the rocks of despair. Consider, for instance, these examples gleaned from recent proses: "There were many fine points in Cato's character," "A great number of select horse and foot," "A king called 'the Peaceful gained the throne and cultivated the arts of peace," "The Numidians scoured the country," "Young men of the best condition," "The only two passages in his letter," H Even the meanest slaves had fled," "The emperor was carried in a litter." The last sentence alone was the immediate cause of my spending five agonised hours in conjecture as to whether the locality through which the emperor was carried was in a state of untidiness (in which case the emperor had no right to be there), or as to whether a brood of young pigs acted as his companions and fellow-voyagers on the journey. "If this latter possibility were true," argued, w by what means had the animals contrived to evade the eyes of the attendants and to join their comrade in the conveyance?" Subsequently, I fell a prey to a high fever—a species of delirium—and spent the ensuing fortnight in a kind of trance. The thoughtful student will at least gather that an improvement in prose methods is an urgent necessity.

Let me suggest that the quickest way to facility and efficiency in this department is for the student to employ the aid of Latin verse—the regulation hexameter—arranged so as to pre serve its English aspect, and enlivened—a point I have stressed before—by the use of a little mild humour.

As a specimen, let us take the immortal tale of Roman Virginius. Who has not trembled at the very thought of that stern warrior standing with knife upraised, his fainting daughter leaning upon his breast, and the brutal emperor and soldiers jeering around? Here, then, we give our rendering:—

Romaeque die eodem uproar immensum videres.
Alto in ligno platformo fortis Virginius stetit.
Patris waistcoatum substantium pallida filia clutchit.
Turpis imperator et milites circiter laughunt.
Sed iam ex pocketo Virginius razor extraxit,
I amque elevans weaponum girlam killere parauit,
Tum rapiter in chestam razor accerimum plungit!
Ecce! Id snappit et nihil at allum occurrit.
Cum looko disgusto Virginius razor inspectat:
"Hangite!" inquit, "hoc razor in Germania factum!
"Igitur, pulchra me filia, comeaway instanter homo!"

Such a method should appeal at once to teacher and student. Our only regret is that we are unable, in the little space we have, to treat of such a weighty subject more fully.

—D.J.D.