The Spike: or, Victoria University College Review, September, 1922
Capping Day — The Procession.
Capping Day, as far as the weather was concerned, was dry. Taken as a whole the procession was a great success. Much fire-water was consumed, preserving it from the hands of those who should not drink; some little merriment was caused among school—girls (and flappers); a certain number of atavistic instincts were sublimated, and it cost only some £30 to pay for the damages Altogether the Executive is to be congratulated—but is it the Exec? And that is where the collar-bone of contention arises.
The Executive of the V.U.C. Students' Association assumes full responsibility (moral, if not legal) for the Procession. It organises it (in so far as it is organised). It bravely obtains permission from the Chief of Police to hold the parade through the streets. It puts up notices in the hall. But that is all it does do. It can obviously give no guarantee that the students won't get drunk; that they won't break windows; that they won't kiss old ladies who don't want to be kissed, and affectionately crack a collar-bone or two in passing. It certainly cannot guarantee that all students are gentle men, any more than the British Government can he sure that the Prince of Wales is always fit to become King.
Not with standing this, the Executive (supported by the women of the College—who unfortunately attend Special General meetings more conscientiously than men) has decreed that the Association is morally responsible for the acts of students taking part in the procession. Oh! When are we going to free ourselves of this perfect orgy of spoon-feeding in which we are wallowing (or rather which we are swallowing)! The Executive appoints an Editorial Committee and proceeds to dictate what shall he published in "The Spike." The Chairman of the Professorial Board wishes to censor the programme of the Debating Society. The College council approves of the appointment of the Professors and then endeavours page 12 to regulate what they shall say on social and political questions The Minister for Education appoints a Board of Inquiry and then wants to overrule its decision. And now the Students' Executive desires to make itself responsible for the acts of the individual students during any College function.
Couple with this the fact that no endeavour at all is made (nor effectively can he made) to ensure the good behaviour of the students, and the unutterable folly of the act will be seen.
Any student now, without fear of incurring any resoponsiblity other than legal (and goodness knows, the Executive will he assuming that yet) may take part in a College function; get drunk; break the ten commandments of Moses one after the other, and the ten ribs of a lady friend all together, and our beneficent Association will foot the bill.
Rejoice! Ye cultured students! The Stud. Ass. hath become a beast of burden, shouldering your sins in a manner calculated to put the Sermon on the Mount to everlasting shame, and to make the wisdom of Solomon sound "like unto the crackling of thorns under a pot."