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The Spike: or, Victoria College Review Capping Carnival 1922

Song-Act III. — Shrewd and Chorus. — "When the guns began to thunder."

Song-Act III.

Shrewd and Chorus.

"When the guns began to thunder."

When the guns began to thunder and to paint things red and gory
I perceived the soldiers' blunder. Fighting's not the way to glory.
When they donned their Webb equipment and went marching off to war;

As shell and bullet wounds were not what I was looking for.
I stayed at home and solaced folks by writing lots of news
Of Societies for helping them, all run by German Jews.
I looked after all the girls, et cet; and cheered them up a bit
And spons and glory's come my way.

The fact is I am "IT."

And though my principles by all were formerly tabooed,
In course of time both one and all have realised I'm Shrewd.
And the girls who gave white feathers, soon were sitting on my knee
I've only had to jazz around collecting L.S.D.
And the poor deluded soldiers who once hopped it o'er the sea
Have returned to find the brass hats making me an O.B.E.
Yes, taken all around you'll find War's not to be eschewed,
And the moral that it teaches is—

The Triumph of the Shrewd.