The Spike: or, Victoria College Review, October 1902
Answers to Correspondents
Answers to Correspondents.
P. J. O'R.—Our medical adviser upholds your contention that peanuts are most nutritious. He thinks, however, that they should be used either before or after lectures, and says that after the heavy mental strain of a law lecture they often avert brain fever. He maintains, however, that at lecture they are apt to destroy the power of concentration of the class. We also consulted the janitor on the matter, and he thinks that a single (but heavy) tax should be put on peanut shells.
M. W. R.—After careful consideration we are inclined to think your explanation unsatisfactory. We think it best, therefore, for the sake of the College to hush the matter up. We would point out, however, that ignorance of the law cannot be pleaded as an excuse, and "The Police Offences Act," distinctly lays down that a policeman shall not be assaulted whilst in the execution of his duty. We 'are aware that ordinary rules of precedence would have allowed you to go first, but how is a common policeman to know that P Had you stated the case deliberately and without passion, reason might have prevailed. As it was you held the key of the position first and then the key held you.
G. H. Wo—e—s.— Peanutomania affects children of all ages. In aggravated cases total abstinence is recommended. Homoeopathic remedies will give relief, and can do no harm.
Rev. A. N. S—tt—er.—(1.) We regret that we cannot agree with you. Even City By-laws are not more honoured in the breach than in the observance, and we do not believe that the fault lies in the fact that you were found out. We believe on the contrary that obedience to law is a primary duty, and that moral obliquity gains nothing from being hidden. We regret, therefore, that we cannot open a subscription list to pay your fine. (2.) Under the circumstances your criticism of the moral tone of The Spike rather palls. We hope you will have no reason to so complain of this number. (3.) If your sense of the fitness of things still forbids you buying The Spike, we would remind you that there is still hope. In the words of Alexander the Great, "There are three ways of getting a book—you can buy a book, you can borrow a book, or you can steal a book." We do not presume to advise you, but would say that it is better to return a borrowed book inside a month. We would also point out that by buying a periodical you give credence to the idea that you have read it—a circumstance which would add weight to criticism. (4.) On the whole we are inclined to think it best that you should resign the office you hold in a College Society, and, having made a clean breast of things, again throw yourself on the mercy of the electors.