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The Pamphlet Collection of Sir Robert Stout: Volume 69

Chapter XVI

page 91

Chapter XVI.

Some time after this, or it may have been before—I will not be quite certain—a pretty large force went out in another direction.

By the way, I overlooked making mention of that kit of maize again. There was an old chief, civil, supposed to be Wiremu Kingi, residing on the Waimate Plains between our camp and Waroa. This old chap was a sort of a go-between. He could readily bring himself to act for either us or the enemy. He frequently called at our camp, and I noticed he generally put in an appearance about dinner time, and he could cause a large amount of tucker to disappear, and seem none the worse for the exertion necessary to do it.

The day after our trip out to Keteaneta he came in, and could tell us all that happened.

"One pakeha," he said, "dropped a kit of maize; never opened it. If he had, he would have found twenty-five sovereigns in it."

"When I heard this I felt very, very much annoyed; but I was careful not to let my brother sergeants know that I was the greenhorn who had it in my hand. The fact of telling Shea to open it made it more so.

To revert to the other place visited. This was, I fancy, the same place which afterwards became famous—Te-Ngutuote-Manu—where the gallant Von Temskey and other officers were shot down about three years after, when Titokowaru caused trouble on the West Coast, which kept the colony in a constant state of ferment for some time.

The party arrived at a little deserted village, and Colonel McDonnell was sent off in one direction with a party of friendly natives, and our men—two companies—under Captain Sir Robert Douglas and myself, were sent in another.

After going about a mile, we heard a shot across in the direction taken by the natives.

Sir Robert said, "Those fellows have dropped on the enemy, and we are out of it; but we shall soon be sent for."

We could hear the firing become more lively every minute, and were anxious to be with them. In the midst of his we came upon quite a number of bee hives, and nearly every one went for some honey. I can picture now Sir Robert leaning forward being fed by a man of his company. He would not handle it himself as he had his sword and revolver in his hands.

Before we could dispose of all the honey a trooper [unclear: cam] thundering up with orders for us to go back and up to the assistance of the natives. Some of my men said, [unclear: "Now] Sergeant, you are in it, we shall be engaged under you, at it may give you a lift."

As we hurried up we came upon our native [unclear: friends] possession of a nice village, and scattered all round firing [unclear: into] the bush, and all chance of a brush was gone.

There was one of the civil natives wounded, named [unclear: Collins] a resident of Turakina, near Wanganui. He recovered, [unclear: and] I met him frequently for many years after.

In due time we all got back to our rallying point, [unclear: and] were just marching campwards, when we got a volley [unclear: from] not four hundred yards off. They had followed as closely [unclear: a] they dare without detection. They soon got a reply and [unclear: wife] considerable interest.

Colonel McDonnell, with his native contingent, went [unclear: off] chase, but very little came of it, and we were soon off. [unclear: There] were many of those little expeditions, but very little [unclear: re] advantage was gained apart from making us familiar with the country. Time went.

I was looking for an opportunity of rejoining my company; in Wanganui, and in December an order came for me to go in. A brother sergeant was anxious to go into Wanganui; get married, (this is the same previously referred to [unclear: a] having had a dream the night before the [unclear: capture] Otopawa Pah), and begged me to exchange companies [unclear: with] him and let him go in.

I agreed to this, and it was duly arranged he was to [unclear: go] in by the next convoy, but before that time came an [unclear: orde] came up that on no account were any to leave their [unclear: post] until further orders, as General Chute was about to start [unclear: from] Wanganui to New Plymouth and go behind Mount Egmont.

On the 12th January, 1866, all the force that could [unclear: be] spared from Manawopou and Waingongoro were sent to [unclear: join] the General's force for the purpose of carrying out [unclear: certain] operations round that part of the country. Poor [unclear: Sulliva] was one, and he only returned with several others to camp [unclear: for] burial.

The General and his force passed on after doing [unclear: what] had laid himself out to do, and took the course leading [unclear: behind] the mountain.

On their way they ran short of meat and had to dispatch some of the horses of the expedition. I, with many others, are of opinion that they didn't kill many horses, because all who are acquainted with New Zealand's grand forests are aware that the animals left by Captain Cook have plenty of offspring, and in no places can they be found in such numbers as where the naughty pakea has had but little to do.

Shortly after this all the "Die Hards" at Waingongoro removed out to the place now known as Waihi, an open encampment. The same routine life was enjoyed until the middle of March, when we started for a five days' march into Wanganui. This was cheerfully undertaken, and the fatigue of it was very little thought of, knowing as everyone did that it was almost like going home, and that they would be met and heartily welcomed by very old and in some cases loving friends.

Speaking for myself, I don't think I slept the night we made our last halt at Alexander's farm, for the next day I was to see one whom I had not gazed on for over four years.

Next day we moved on our last stage. At the top of St. John's Hill the regimental band was waiting for us, accompanied by scores of others, both brothers in arms and civilians, to whom the whole regiment was well known.

At 4 p.m. that afternoon Colonel Buller ordered a parade of his command, when, accompanied by the colonel commanding the regiment, he came and made a few remarks suitable to the occasion. Then Colonel Logan had his say, and thanked all hands for their conduct during their period on duty in the field.

That evening, decked up as I had not been for some time, I betook myself to a certain house in Wilson Street. Before I reached the gate loading into it I could see a head reaching over it; but I was not allowed to get to it—not there. There was a hop, skip, and a jump, and the meeting was destined not to take place in the open air. Perhaps it was as well. I thought so, and I think I can vouch for it that the other party saw the wisdom of it; hence the run in.

Not long (about a fortnight after) there was a wedding, and the day was not what one would choose, because the saying is, "Happy is the bride on whom the sun shines." We had no sun that day; but I don't think it has resulted in us leading a less happy life than if it registered 90 degrees in the shade.

On the 18th April my part of the regiment embarked on board the s.s. "Arahura" (Captain Flowerday). This leaving Wanganui was a sore trial to some who had spent so long there. I was not bound to it in that way, for I had with me; all I valued in it. The weather was rough as we got down to the Heads, and we returned to the wharf. This, I can say shortly occurred three times, and those interested in our remaining remarked that we should have to remain. However, on the fourth attempt we went over the bar. This proved a sore trial to some.

We arrived at Onehunga, landed, and marched to Otahuhu where we remained a few days prior to going on up the Waikato, Te Awamutu being our destination.

No war now. All was peace and goodwill, and the met were looking forward to the time when they would be ploughing the wide ocean on their way back to the old land.

In September '66, a couple of companies were ordered down to Auckland, mine being one of them. Here we remained till March '67, when all men entitled to their discharge could get it, and those not entitled to a free one could purchase. I had decided not to leave the colony, and early in April the good ships "Electra" and "Maori" took from these shores all the "Die Hards" who could not or would not remain.

Many took French leave, and the "Alice Cameron" bark, going to Sydney, took several, both of those discharge and those who were not. The "Maori" had a dreadful passage home. This was the one I should have gone in, had I elected to go. She was 130 days getting home. It was the opinion of all that they never would reach it.

After hearing this, I expressed my delight at not going——though I had regretted it several times before that news came back to me. I see the old corps has faithfully upheld into good reputation since it left these shores, nearly a quarter of a century ago. Let us pray that they ever will in whatever duties they may be called upon to perform.

There died at Dymchurch, England, on the 22nd July 1887, a very old "Die Hard," Barnard Morris, born in 1792 He was present with the regiment at Waterloo. A shot; time before he died, the regiment passed through Dymchurch on its way to Lydd, and Morris made himself known as a: old comrade. On the return of the regiment, a halt was made opposite Morris's house, the colours were dipped, arms page 95 presented, and the band played in honour of the old veteran soldier, who, after having inspected the regiment, was greeted with three cheers. It was probably the proudest day of the old man's life.

Another old "Die Hard" of the "Die Hards" ended his days about a-year-and-a-half ago in the Auckland Province. He, at the age of about 80, came on board the "Castillion" on our arrival in Auckland, in January, 1861. He was then a fine hale, active man, and looked good for another thirty or forty years. He was present with the regiment at the battle of Albuhera on the 16th May, 1811, from which the name of "Die Hards" was given. He was made much of by all ranks.

After the departure of the regiment, and when trouble began, a few of the old regiment were well to the fore. When the natives attacked Tura-Tura-Moka, but for a few of them, they would have taken and slaughtered all hands. Three of them fell whilst fighting like demons. Those were—George Holden, Ralph Ross, and Wm. Gaynor. Michael Gill, another "Die Hard," came out of it, and with other survivors received a special grant of land.

Like many of its members, the old colours, which received such a battering at Inkermann, and in which every officer who held them shared, and which subsequently went to India and then to this colony, have been placed in their permanent resting place, and as this will be news to many, and interesting to all, I reproduce the account as taken from a London paper: "On January 22nd, 1874, an unusual but interesting ceremony was observed at the Mansion House, in the presence of the Lord Mayor and Lady Mayoress and a few private friends. In conformity with a previous arrangement, a detachment of the 57th West Middlesex regiment, under the command of Major Shortt, waited upon the Lord Mayor on their way to St. Paul's Cathedral, bearing the colours of the regiment, which, as may be remembered, had fought at Albuera, Vittoria, The Peninsula, Inkermann, Sebastopol, and New Zealand.

"The ceremony was held in the saloon of the Mansion House, the Lord Mayor being attended on the occasion by the Corporation Sword-and Mace-Bearers, and by Major Campbell, the City Marshall. Major Shortt, addressing the Lord Mayor, said, 'He had reason to know that his Lordship had been previously informed that new colours had been presented to the regiment, and that the old ones were to be page 96 lodged in St. Paul's Cathedral. Assuming that to be so, he had now to ask, on the part of the officers of the regiment, that the Lord Mayor would allow the old colours to be borne through the city—with fixed bayonets—and unfurled on the, way to the cathedral.'

"The Lord Mayor expressed the pleasure he felt in acceding to a request so reasonable and honourable. He knew the service which the regiment had rendered the country from time to time, and it was gratifying to know that the trophies of their valour were to be deposited within the great metropolitan cathedral. He added that the city of London had at all times been proud of the army, and had never been slow to recognise its services in defence of the honour and interests of the country. These flags, the trophies of the pas exploits of the 57th Regiment, were to be lodged beneath the dome of St. Paul's, and there long might they remain to excite the emulation of the citizens.

"Major Short thanked the Lord Mayor for the readiness he had evinced to do honour to the occasion, and he was sure it would afford the officers and men of the regiment much gratification." The ceremony then terminated.

As proof of the genuine affection Sir H. J. Warre, K.C.B., had for the old corps, I purpose to make a few extracts from letters received from the gallant old soldier.

page 94
(From a letter dated

"I was very pleased to hear from you again. It is always a great satisfaction to learn that any of the old 57th, to whom I was much attached, are doing well and comfortably settled in the country of their choice. The deaths of our old friends, Collins and Cummings, are very sad. The latter, especially, was so young and active that he ought to have outlived many older men. The 'Die Hards' are now in Ceylon, and keeping up their old reputation. Colonel Logan has retired. Owing to the illness of Colonel Stewart, which obliges him to be in England, Major Clarke is in command, and Captain Piggott has recently been promoted Major; but there have been so many changes in the junior ranks that very few of the officers who were in New Zealand are now with the regiment. England has been on the verge of war with Russia; but nobody wanted to see another Crimean War, and her victories over the poor gallant Turks ought to page 97 make Russia moderate in her demands. I send you my photo, and trust it will arrive safely. Thanking you for your excellent letter and wishing you every happiness, I am sincerely yours.


"H. J. Warre."

"P. and O. Co.'s 'Hydaspis,' Gibraltar,

"Dear Old Comrade,—I have sent you a few more photos to give to such of my old comrades in New Zealand who desire to have a remembrance of their old commanding officer. That there may be some who do not continue to be a credit to the regiment is, I fear, probable in a new country where labour is scarce and therefore highly paid, and spirits are cheap. I would rather not contemplate the probability of an old 'Die Hard' disgracing his name, but ask such as are like yourself interested in the dear old regiment and its colonel during its service in New Zealand, to rejoice in the fact that I have been selected by the Queen, and am now on my way to India, to succeed General Sir Charles Stavely, K.C.B., as Commander-in-chief of the Bombay Army—an army of more than 35,000 men, and one of the highest and most responsible positions in the power of a general officer to hold. Had I the old 57th to back me I should be quite satisfied, and should not feel the least uneasy at the evident desire of Russia to counterbalance our power in Afghanistan and on our north-western frontier. I have asked Colonel Clark to join me in Bombay as Military Secretary; but as he has only recently become Lieutenant-colonel of the regiment by the death of Colonel Stewart, I fear his love for the regiment and his desire to command it will deprive me of his assistance in the control of the Bombay Army. Mrs. Warre accompanies me to India, and like myself, is always glad to hear from you and of the well-being of any of the dear old corps. Wishing success to you all in the splendid country of your adoption,

"I am, as always,

"Your true friend,


"H.J. Warre.

"The 57th is about to be removed from Ceylon to Gibraltar, and in another year or two will return to England."

Note.—On their way to Gibraltar Colonel Clarke landed them at the Cape and took part in the Zulu War; and it was page 98 to Colonel Clarke, when acting as a brigadier, that the old King was handed over when captured.

"Alpes, Maritimes, "France,

"Dear Old Friend,—It gave me very great pleasure to receive your letter from Featherston, dated 21st November last, which followed me here in my search for warmth and health, my health having failed latterly to an alarming extent but the bright blue skies and fine climate of this part of the Mediterranean coast ought to set me up and do me good. I cannot forget that on the 3rd February, 1837, I got my come mission as ensign in the 54th regiment, just 50 years ago, so I have no right to complain if I do feel a little cripply, and not quite the same man as when in command of the dear gallant old 'Die Hards' on the 18th June 1855, and 8th September 1855, before Sebastopol. I think it very likely that we (England) shall be dragged into another war with Russia [unclear: er] long. War between Russia and Austria is almost certain soon, and if the elections go against Bismarck in Germany, there will be war between France and Germany. In fact the whole of Europe will be in arms, and I do not see how England is to maintain her neutrality. If England can do so it will be a grand thing for the country. Our merchant service will [unclear: rea] the benefit, and our ships will be the carriers of the world but Russia has her eye upon Herat and Persia. England cannot allow Russia to establish herself in the Persian Gulf India I look upon as quite safe for the next twenty years of more; but there is also another danger which England cannot allow, viz., Russia now wants to get possession of the north coast of Norway and Sweden, so as to create a harbour in the Arctic Sea for the Russian fleet, at Havervest, or in one [unclear: of] the fjords near the North Cape of Norway. So you see you are well off in New Zealand, especially if inland, as Russian will have enough to do elsewhere, and will only levy black mail on the Australian large towns on the coast, if not properly defended. I went last summer to the Arctic Sea and visited Norway and all its spendid coast. No wonder Russia want to make use of what is now a wilderness. Many millions of cod-fish are caught and exported, and many millions are made into 'cod liver oil.' Whales, seals, and cod all contribute for the staple export. Oil! Oil! Oil!

page 99

"I have written you a long story in return for your excellent letter, and I have enclosed another photo which will speak for itself. Now I wish, if war is to be, we could all go back with our gained experience to fight for our Queen and country and the good cause, for England never fights unless there is good reason, to defend the oppressed and to maintain the balance of power, without which Europe would cease to exist, and our Queen would, as the Yankees say, be nowhere.

"I am sorry I cannot send you a copy of the 'Historical Records of the 57th Regiment.' I was so unwell in London I could not go to Mitchell's, the publisher, to know if they are out of print, but if God spares me to return to England I will make enquiry and send you a copy. Meanwhile Lady Warre and I join in hearty good wishes to you and yours,

" Ever your old friend, (Signed)

"H. J. Warre,

"Reading Berks,

"Dear Old Comrade,—If I cannot write you so interesting and agreeable a letter as yours of the 11th July, it is not from want of intention; but newspapers in these days deprive one of all that is interesting by way of public news, while life in this Old Country is reduced to a monotony that renders anything like description impossible. It is always a subject for rejoicing to find oneself remembered by old comrades, and to hear of their well-being in the distant land of their adoption. I sent your letter to Dublin, where Colonel and Mrs. Clarke now are. He is deputy-adjutant-general, with and under Prince Edward of Saxe Weimar. He begs me to say how pleased Mrs. Clarke and he are at your kind recollection of them. We see very little of them now that they are obliged to be in Ireland; but Colonel Clarke will become a major-general in another year or two, and will then have a spell unemployed. He is an excellent officer, and still devoted to his profession. That you are a grandfather makes one wonder at the rapid flight of time. You are to be envied on account of your good health and activity. What a pleasure and satisfaction it is to think that you and many other settlers from the dear old 'Die Hards' are enjoying life in comparative com- page 100 fort in so splendid a country as New Zealand. My son-in-law, Colonel Clarke, says he looks forward some day to revisit Taranaki. My time is past; but I never cease to pray for the continued happiness and prosperity of those we left behind in that splendid country. I am rather stronger and better in health, but cannot boast as you can that I am nearly what I used to be. My wife joins me in every good wish for the complete success of you and yours. I am very glad to hear that you were able while in Taranaki to do something to secure the restoration and repair of the soldiers' graves. It was an act of special grace, worthy of an old 'Die Hard.' Your description of the place is most interesting. I am surprised to hear that Colonel Stapp is still in the fore, and delighted to learn that my old friend Thomas Furlong is so prosperous.—Sincerely yours,


"H. J. Warre."

Extracts from a letter from Major (now Major-General) Clarke:—

"Colombo, Ceylon,

"Dear Sir,—Your letter reached me not many days ago. I was very glad indeed to receive it, and to hear of your welldoing, as the success in life of anyone who has served with me in the gallant old 'Die Hards' is, and always will be a matter of interest. General Warre told me some time ago he had sent you his photo. I am sorry to say I have not such a thing in my possession, as I have not been taken for years, but as I appear in a photographic group which was taken some two years ago of the officers of the regiment at head quarters, and come out pretty well in it, I send you a copy of the group, and have little doubt it will be far more interesting to you than a single one of myself. Poor Colonel Stewart died at Guernsey on the 6th May. He was unconscious for a week before his death. Only a few days before his last seizure he wrote to me talking hopefully of coming out again, but that was not to be. I much regret his death, as he was an old friend and a good honest man, with the interest of the regiment always at his heart. I hear that I am certain to get the regiment, and am expecting to hear daily that I am gazetted. I am thankful that it should come while I am still young and have plenty of energy to devote to the responsibilities of the post, and the only drawback connected with it page 101 is that it will remove me from the regiment in five years, for, as I daresay you have heard, the command of a regiment is now only a five years appointment.

"There is only one person now in the regiment who was in it when I joined in 1856—Mr Wood, the quarter-master. You may have heard that our old colours were placed in St. Paul's Cathedral some years ago. I thought it would be a good opportunity to get up a subscription to erect a memorial in St. Paul's to those who fell or died in the Crimea and New Zealand, and I am pleased to say I received in little more than a year, from past and present officers of the regiment, a sum of over £600, with which a very handsome has-relief has been erected in St. Paul's under the old Crimea, India, and New Zealand colours, and on a brass below is the detail of all those lost in the two campaigns.

"After I left England to join the regiment here, General Inglis, who is a die hard of the 'Die Hards' (his father commanded the regiment at Albuhera), took np the superintendence of the work for me, and it has been brought to a very successful issue. I am sorry to say I have been laid up more or less for the past five weeks, but my doctor gives me good hopes of recovery without the necessity of going to England for change. I am able to attend to all documentary work, but cannot leave the house. It is very provoking being laid up just at this time, but I have generally been blessed with such good health that I have no business to complain. I often think of New Zealand and wonder whether I shall ever see it again, for I have a great affection for the country, and if I live hope to visit it at some future time. I spent a very pleasant five years there.

"I fancy the regiment is sure to leave Ceylon this year. We were to have gone to the Cape, but there are so many regiments there now that we should hardly be required as a relief. All moves, however, are in abeyance so long as the present uncertainty exists as to war or peace. You ask after my family. We have three children, the two eldest are girls and are in England; the youngest, a boy between five and six years old, is with us here. Kindly remember me to any of the old regiment you come across. Wishing you every success, in which Mrs Clarke joins, and hoping you will like the photo,

"Believe me yours faithfully,

"Chas. M. Clarke."

page 102
Names of members of the regiment who lost their lives in New Zealand:—
  • Lieut.—colonel J. Hazzard
  • Captain T. W. J. Lloyd
  • Lieutenant T. H. Traggett
  • Lieutenant J. T. Downes
  • Ensign Duncan
  • Surgeon McAndrew
  • Assist.—surgeon Hope
  • Color-sergeant Ellis
  • Color-sergeant E. Meredith
  • Sergeant Ashworth
  • Sergeant F. Day
  • Sergeant S. Hill
  • Sergeant J. Sullivan
  • Sergeant T. Traynor
  • Corporal W. Traynor
  • Corporal A. McLachlin
  • Bugler Moran
  • Private J. Anderson
  • Private J. Bailey
  • Private J. Banks
  • Private R. Bates
  • Private J. Bland
  • Private G. Brown
  • Private H. Cain
  • Private R. Casey
  • Private J. Cleary
  • Private R. Connell
  • Private M. Connor
  • Private D. Crane
  • Private R. Doake
  • Private J. Denahy
  • Private P. Doolan
  • Private J. Dooley
  • Private J. Driscoll
  • Private E. Dunnett
  • Private H. East
  • Private T. Fain
  • Private T. Finn
  • Private M. Fleming
  • Private J. Flynn
  • Private J. Gascoigne
  • Private A. Gillespie
  • Private E. Gillett
  • Private W. Gosling
  • Private C. Horrigan
  • Private J. Jones
  • Private R. Keeffe
  • Private E. Kelly
  • Private G. King
  • Private B. McCarthy
  • Private M. McCarthy
  • Private J. McChristol
  • Private H. McGregor
  • Private J. McGuire
  • Private J. Manning
  • Private E. Martin
  • Private G. May
  • Private H. Miles
  • Private M. Mulcahy
  • Private P. Muskill
  • Private J. Nixon
  • Private J. Osborne
  • Private T. Palmer
  • Private R. Robertson
  • Private T. Rollings
  • Private M. Ryan
  • Private G. Saddler
  • Private P. Scully
  • Private H. Shipman
  • Private P. Sheehan
  • Private R. Simms
  • Private J. Walsh
  • Private R. Walton
  • Private T. White
  • Private G. Willis

Prior to entering the "Die Hards" the writer was in the "Springers" (62nd foot) for a year, he therefore can be excused for giving an anecdote or two connected with that regiment.

Major Taylor returned from the Crimea in '55 to Malta, having been wounded, and then took command of the 2nd divisional battalion, which occupied Verdella Barracks. The Major was passing out of the barrack gate one day in a terrible hurry, and coming suddenly upon the sentry, he was past him before he could give the customary present, which compliment was entirely ignored. So the man remarked to a picquet sentry close at hand, "I'll never present arms to that old d——l again."

The Major suddenly turned on his heel, rushed back, and shook his fist in the sentry's face, and said, "That old d——l doesn't care a d——n whether you do or not," then turned and went his way.

It need hardly be said that the sentry was somewhat taken aback. The gallant Major went again to the Crimea as the Colonel of the regiment, but he did not leave it a second time.

page 103

Paddy Doyle's Deafness.

Paddy enlisted with the "Springers" in '55, and was soon in the depot at Mullingar. He regretted his rash act, so in order to be restored to his native village in preference to facing the Russians, he pretended deafness. This he carried out with fair success for a time, and it was thought that he would soon be a free man again. Early one evening he was passing out of the gate for a stroll, when who should he meet but the Adjutant, who had a dog with him; so he said to Paddy, "Doyle, just hold this dog till you hear me whistle, then let him go."

Paddy, of course, undertook the task, and the officer walked on a hundred yards or so, then gave a whistle which only a man of good hearing could have heard. Off went the dog, and Paddy off his guard. The officer called Paddy to him and said, "Now, Doyle, no more of this acting, or we shall tie you up."

Deafness was put off, and in due time he faced the Russians, but I cannot remember how he fared, but I fancy he was left behind when the regiment took its departure.

page 104

Slow Paddy Drum.

Paddy enlisted rather late in life with the 41st Regiment and went out to Malta with a party of that regiment in '55 He was one of those usually termed "one of the Queen's be bargains," and why he was ever passed to go abroad [unclear: was] mystery. There was really no life in him. He could only walk at a snail's pace, and all his actions were just in keeping and for innocence Paddy was perfection. He'd believe whatever a man would tell him. He would never judge for himself. For instance, if he saw men preparing for parade he would not be guided by how they were going. If it was "marching order parade," Paddy would creep out in "undress," and vice versa. Being such a slow card, it was not likely Paddy would be very punctual in taking his place in the ranks. The battalion would be usually inspected, told off, and ready to march away to the drill ground when Paddy would be seen or heard dragging his feet along the pavement bordering the square. By way of a change he would sometimes pipeclay his boots. To punish such a heap of innocent would be a crime. None of us ever thought there was acting about him. His looks, manner, and his actions indicated nothing of the kind. I think Paddy was sent home eventually to gladden the hearts of his friends, as his absence from them must have been a sore trial.

Hardly on the Square.

Those who have any knowledge of dockyards are wel aware that smoking is strictly prohibited. It is therefore [unclear: n] small hardship to guards who are on duty for twenty-four hours to be deprived [unclear: of] the soothing weed for that length of time. As may be inferred, this, like all other strict rules, [unclear: is] sometimes broken. One night, at the hours when [unclear: burglars;] and clothes thieves (here) usually select for carrying out [unclear: their] deep-laid plots, a big Grenadier, named Bittle, of the "[unclear: Die] Hards," was on sentry in the dockyard at Malta, and [unclear: was] infringing this rule in the sentry-box, when the man in [unclear: blue], who had evidently been attracted to the spot by [unclear: fragrant] odours of the weed, suddenly appeared before him, without in the slightest apprising him of his approach, and said, "You're smoking."

"Y-y-as," said Bittle.

"Hand me over that pipe and tobacco."

"Do you want a draw?" said Bittle.

page 105

"No," was the reply; "but I want the proof against you."

"Well," said the sentry, "if you are mighty be a little merciful."

"No; hand it over. I've caught you at last"

"Now," said the sentry, "what pleasure will it be to you to see me punished for this heinous offence? I'll be careful that it does not happen again."

"No use. Hand it over at once."

"Very well then, if you will have it, take it."

As soon as the policeman got possession he was moving off, and Bittle knew that was to the sergeant of the guard to have him relieved and his belts taken off (to be made a prisoner).

"Where are you going," said the sentry, "in such a hurry? Come here."

"No use," said the policeman; "I can't look over it."

"Nor can I," said the sentry. "Go in there (pointing to the sentry box). You are my prisoner, and budge if you dare."

The sentry called for the sergeant of the guard, who was soon on the spot.

"Here, Sergeant, I've made a prisoner of this policeman for smoking in the dockyard. Search him, and you'll find his pipe, still warm."

The policeman was nearly knocked dumb with astonishment and vehemently protested his innocence and explained the real position of affairs, which the sergeant was inclined to believe. Still he must support the sentry. It ended, however, in a compromise. Both agreed (policeman and sentry) to say no more about it.

Persons should be very careful how they act towards a sentry, for he possesses great power.

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