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The Pamphlet Collection of Sir Robert Stout: Volume 2

Lambton Kay, Willin'ton, March, 1, 1880

Lambton Kay, Willin'ton,

Bedad it's a proud man I am this day, an' no mistake, for I've succeeded in injoocin' the Ministhry to offer the vacant portfoley to me ould frind Tom Dick. Av coorse I'm still opposed to the Hall Government, but at the same time whiniver they want advice on any important measure, I'm niver too proud to give it to thim Well, one day last week, whilst I was packin up me boxes an' chists for me intinded tower wid Pasthor Shin iky, who the dickens should dhrop into me stewjeo but Johuny Hall. "Misther Murphy," ses he, "I want yer advice on a very sayrious matther. "D'ye tell me so?" ses I, "an' what may that be, Johnny, mavrone?" ses I. Well, PaIdy, allanah, I m thinkin' about offerin' the vacant portfoley to Misther Dick, av Dunaydin, and I jist called to ax yer advice in the matther," ses Johnny. "Luk here. Johnny, ses I, "Be the hokey poker ye've jist hit the right nail on the head, Tom Dick is the very man to shuit ye," ses I, an' av ye don't make haste about it, begorra ye may lose him," ses I, "for, betchune you an' me, Misther Dick is undher offer av engagement to thravel wid mesilf an' the Pasthor on our tower. A rivirind an' solemn-looking chairman has a great dail to do wid the success av a meetin', an the Pasthor thinks av he could injooce Misther Dick to thravel wid us he would double the number av his convarts in a very short time," ses I. "Blur-an'-ages, d'ye tell me so ?" ses Johnny; "be the hokey, I must run to the tiligraph offis an' wire to him at onced,' ses Johnny, as he rushed down stairs. That same night I sthruck off the followin' pome in honour av the occashun: