The Pamphlet Collection of Sir Robert Stout: Volume 2
The Rooshin Bear.
In ainshint story, yer sowl to glory,
Whin lagions gory incompassed Throy,
Bekaise fair Chrysis an' lovely Brisis
Aitch ran away wid an Athanian boy,
They fought like divils wid guns on swivels,
Their haythin rivils were mighty quare,
But ould Pat Rockulus (who sould sprouts an' brockilows)
Ne'er heard from Nesthor av the Rooshin Bear.
Sure ould Ulysses (unknown to his missus)
Found lovely Brissis lamintin' Pat,
An' the other day, sure, across the say, sure,
The Bear was Rooshin upon Tallowfat;
Fat's in his line, for in Asia Minor
The divil a finer hog's lard is there
To roast a Turkey, an' so to work he
Set out in airnest, did this Rooshin Bear.
Big Alexandher, ou say or land or
On mount is grander thin the mighty Mars,
He's great at talkin', an' don't like walkin',
An' so he's sthrivin' to capture Kars;
He often cusses the omnibusses
(The royal Russ is a baiste to swear),
So this ould Cossack has thried to fossick
Some Turkish coaches for the Rooshin Bear,
Besides a vayicle he keeps a baigle,
Likewise an aigle, for he's fond av sport,
He's often merry a dhrinkin' sherry,
But his eye is always upon the Parte;
In imparial garmint he can prache a sarmint—
Av I had the varmint, in the County Clare
Wid a good shillaley, faix I'd go bail he
Would houl out murthur, would this Rooshin Bear.
Wid the aid av science an' our alliance
The Turks' defiance meets this ould boss,
He's just pritindin' to be difindin'
(For all his actions are on the Cross)
The Chrystian craytures—but his ugly faytures
Shows he's not in airnest nor on the square,
His tint has holes, for he smashed the Poles.
An' faix we can sec through this Rooshin Bear.
But tare-an'-ages, if England rages,
An' loudly wages Impayrial war.
To guard Aist Injy we'll not be stingy,
But for rivinge we will face the Czar.
Our grand resources an' mighty forces
Av Volunteers won't be in the rare,
Our War Vocabulerry has the Armed Constabulerry,
Their rifle muzzles will be on the Bear.
The Waikari Rangers will scorn all dangers,
From foes an' sthrangers they'll guard the baich,
An' our Willin'ton Rifles won't stop at trifles,
They're sure to keep out o' the inimy's raich;
The Christchurch Yeomen will make a show, min.
They're full o' "go," min, an' they, ll do their share,
An' Major Gordon will form a cordon
Av Northern haroes for to hunt the Bear.
Paddy Murphy.Lambton Kay, Wellin'ton,
April 30th, 1877.