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Salient. Official Newspaper of the Victoria University Students' Association. Vol 44 No. 1. March 2 1981

Salient notes

Salient notes

Creeping out of the Deep Dark Depths of Depravity (also known as the Salient editor's office) came a dreaded Barrow-man; one of that savage breed known as technical editors. Weilding his whip with wild abandon, he roared wrathfully "For-sooth, ye foul, flabby, festering fools! We have five hours to finish this feeble, fraudulent pile of faeces — so get to it!" Having uttered these mighty words of dubious wisdom, he retreated to the typesetter's room to contemplate life in general and booze in particular. A stunned crowd, ie Paulus "the wood-gnome" Wiggins and Racey Tracey Cooper, gathered around the light table murmuring "What are we going to do now?" "Has anyone seen the cross-word?" cried Mirthful Mark Harris. "Here 'tis" Ganesh Nana replied, wittily scrawling "anger" across the door. This effect was spoiled as the door crashed open and Mary Hubble came through with a harried expression in her hair (this has to be seen to be believed).

"Where's Stephen?" she screamed, failing over the Wilson Gang: Mark, Jessica and Simon, who were playing with page four copy. "Egad" cried Kathryn lrvine, "I just finished that". Leaping across the room to grab them, she collided with Andrew Beach who was arising with aplomb from the rubbish bin wherein he had been reposing. "Urgghh" muttered Andrew with characteristic style. Whereupon English Major Michele A'Court proceeded to deliver a diatribe upon the intrinsic value of the expression uttered by Andrew. Helen McNaught added her piece by saying "Yes Andrew, do improve your language," the last word being punctuated by a flying bottle aimed at Andrew's head. Her aim being off, due to the ex-contents of said bottle, the projectile missed said Beach and caromed instead off Jonathan Taylor's head onto Paulette Keating, both of whom collapsed to the floor groaning "Urgghh!" Thus 'Urgghh' becomes part of our language by popular aclamation.

Sali-urgghh is edit-urgghhed by Stephen A'Court, published by V Urgghh WSA and printed by Wanganui Urgghhpapers Ltd, Drews Ave., Wanganui.

THINKS SIGH... I WISH I HAD SOMETHING FOR ABJECT MISERY AND DOWNRIGHT WRETCE DNE SS;