A Thief Speaks Up

I would respectfully suggest to the -unknowing girl", whose money was stolen, that her letter on that subject is highly emotive and irrational, and therefore obviously written in the heat of the moment. Furthermore, her description of me is sterio-typed and sexist (and fundamentally incorrect) as well as being an insult to male students generally. Also, she must be incredibly stupid to leave such a large amount of money in a public place where it is such a temptation for whoever happens to find it while engaged in a cursory search of those bags which look promising - people like her keep people like me in business.

Most of the third paragraph of her letter is totally irrelevant to the matter in hand, but the best part is the P.S. - besides being the most vulgar and sexist writing I have seen for a long time, it is also manifestly inconsistent and does me a grave injustice - how can a "fucking cunt", as she so expressively puts it, (and she should know what one is, of all people) also be a "sonuvabitch" and have a cock and balls?