Festival of Useless Spaces:

Useless events will include:

The balcony scene from Romeo and Juliet, performed from the balcony of Kirk to Von Zedlitz, through megaphones.

Competitive ballroom dancing will be held in the lecture block foyer. Ezra Pound Cantos will be read from the Ezra Pound Memorial Balcony, also in the lecture block foyer. Jonathon Besaer and Jack Body's Euphony, group will al to be pretty useless in the lecture block foyer, jousting and uselss jogging will also feature.

Staircase music, glass music, birds - tapes by Douglas Lilburn and Ross Harris will be sounded on the useless stairway at the beck of Kirk. Britannia will sing God Save the Queen back-Wards standing on her heed on the half hour on Wednesday in the Memorial Theatre. To conclude, there will be a closing ceremony, consecrating the Memorial Theatre as a perfectly useless space for the rest of the year.

Architecture students will be having a colour-in between Rankine Brown and Easterfield.

Richard Burton will [unclear: tead] Milton in the Library lift, which being extremely large and (low is rather useless.

Cucumber sandwiches will feature in a Cambridge setting beside the Cam outside Hunter. Come end loll, looking intelligent and useless. Punt poles will be provided. This scene is especially effective in the pouring rain.

4-a-side hockey will be played on the balcony outside the staff common room. Since this is a large space to which students are not generally admitted, it is very useless.

A popish Mummery, featuring a series of dying popes will take place in Italian, Latin and Polish - not very useful languages - and the Popes will be buried and resurrected on the Cotton Site.

Jaffa-rolling competitions will be held down appropiate stairways. Prizes for the furthest rollers.

Phonetic Poetry will be performed on the Kirk staircase.

Useless economics will be demonstrated out-tide the library. Models in jelly and water, also featuring coloured chalk.

Continental buskers and beggars will feature in the Von Zedlitz corridor which being one of the most useless corridors in the University will provide an appropriate setting for a depressing spectacle.

Remember, you too Can be Useless. Anyone Seen Running Down Kelburn Parade Between the Appointed Hours will be doing a Useless Thing'

Why Not Dream up your Own Specially Useless Activity?

How About Reading Last Year's Lecture Notes Aloud From the Top of New Kirk?

A Lot of Vic. is Useless, Go There Now, Find a Space and be Useless in it.

There Are Some Spaces in the University where it is Believeo Nobody Has Ever Been! Plant a Virgin Foot Print!