This One Took a While

What have you done with Fat Freddys' Cat? As a conisewer of this vital literature I was extremely disappointed to see your uncultured rag did not include a further installment of this epic saga.

If you have run out of this important literature please apply to the classics department for some furry freak brothers comics. Its about time a classy feature such as this was added to your unworthy publication.

Bus Passes

Is there any valid reason why university students are not eligilbe for bus passes on W.C.C. buses? Teacher's Training College students receive travel allowances for travel to and from Karori. Polytech students may use bus passes the same as those available to primary' and secondary school students. Therefore is seems grossly unfair that we as university students, who are just as hard up (if not more so) as other tertiary students, do not receive such a concession.

I am sure that many fellow student commuters feel equally discontented. Can anything be done to alleviate this dire situation?

The Palestinian Question

In a region embittered by a generation of war, justice is difficult to determine. In the Arab-Israeli conflict it is patently obvious that two wrongs will never make a right.

However, one should make an attempt to clarify the facts. While the PLO, according to Time Magazine of the 28th of March 1978, have since the October War of 1973, been responsible for the death of 143 people, the Israeli government, according to the same source are charged with the killing of over 2,000 Palestinians in aggressive acts against a dispersed people.

While President Sadat and most of the Arab states condemn any form of terrorism in which innocent civilians are killed, such fanaticism by a people driven to desperation only serves to underscore the necessity for a solution to the question of the Palestinian homeland, as the central issue in the Arab-Israeli conflict.

It is now seriously doubted by some high ranking officials in the American administration whether Israel is truly genuine in its desire for peace. The Israeli invasion of Lebanon shows that they are still trying to achieve security by aggression, expansion, and occupation, rather than by agreeing to live with the Palestinians in a just and durable peace.

Certainly, the presence of 25,000 Israeli troops in Lebanon put a major obstacle in the road to peace along which President Sadat so courageously began to tread when he shattered all the old rules and concepts, and broke the vicious circle of procedural wrangling, by visiting Jerusalem in November 1977.

Burble Burble

Hello I'd like to talk to you about the selective dialysis of Calcium containing proteins, but my genital speech defect, i.e. talking a load of cobblers, puts it out of the question. One topic of interest is, "How long is a piece of string when it's wet", but the answer is so obvious as to rule out its use as a post-doctoral research topic. Golf shoes could be used as a thesis topic, but if you've got a hole-in-one you'll probably have to throw the pair away.

However, this is deviating rather (for further deviations phone Olga) from the matter in hand, which is, "What is the question?" Bertrand Russel) (brother of Ken) could not have put it better, which is probably why he didn't, or so his wife tells me. But enough of circumlocution (brother of Electro) and let us get straight to the point. "Aha," I hear you cry, "What is the point?" Well, it's that thing on the end of a sharp pencil (or a sharp piece of string if you prefer).

But in all seriousness, life as we know it is unlikely to exist on another planet, because, as any fool knows, God never makes the same mistake twice. If He did, He wouldn't be perfect, and we'd have to write he instead of He. Anyway, you can't believe all you read in the papers if you did you might think that you were a smelly little person with an under-developed chest, mouth, foot and underarm odour, and what hair that you had left could only be saved by washing it in flouride toothpaste.

And, in conclusion, may I say that, as Regius Professor of Nothing At All, I am not allowed to say anything at all, that being my speciality. However, if you, or yours, or somebody elses would care to name a new species, building, planet or physical law after me, then you'll have to wait until I've done it first.

The author of this work has recently been installed as Permanent Undergraduate in the Biochemistry Dept.

Well chaps — how amusing things can be! An election fiasco whot!? Again human nature Never ceases to amaze me — scapegoat(s) have to be found and blame shared out and indeed who more suitable to do this than the honourable retainers of that most noteworthy publication — Salient — who were behaving so obscenely only the other week in the varsity swimming pool in Wai-te-ata Rd. Salient goblins grumbled about inadequate publicity and rightly so by Jove! They were so concerned about it that they decided to make a whole page available for election publicity last week (No. 5 Mar. 27 1978) they neglect to mention that they weren't nearly so keen to provide so much space for this important subject in the two preceding weeks' issues when applications for exec were open. Surely to God old boys, they could have Made space available during this period by shifting other items out — but their overbearing concern for election publicity — or was it something else? — prevented them from doing so. So you see you 'orrible lot out there — Saltne was wright! — publicity was bad and they are at least partially responsible — that's all — more — next week!

Searching for the Facte

While I appreciate (not cynically either) the reporting in 'Salient' (be it your own or someone else's) as it provokes some controversy and conversation making material, I like Mike Treen would protest the scale of the flea punching attacks in the last few 'Salients'. While recognising the necessity to keep 'Salient' informed one almost gets the impression that SRC and other officers are responsible to 'Salient' rather than the student body as a whole and that before the lucky incumbent does anything he/she must make sure Salient approves first.

Often, the inferences and pointless innuendo you publish tell people more about your approach to student politics and indeed, you and your Salient lackeys' approach to politics in general, which need not be described as it is well known.

I would politely suggest that you should have a good shit stir as the Editor, but that in future you should try to be more impartial in your editorial comment and reporting and not allow your own political prejudices or opinions to affect your judgement too much. I hope that the shit stirring continues, but misreporting of facts and getting things the wrong way round will do nothing for 'Salient' or for the interests of the association in general. Construction is better than knitpicking.

Apart from being rather childish, it is clear that Sue Cairney did not advocate exclusive use of the office by herself and furthermore the bursaries issue is an important one and Sue Cairney's proposal to assign that office for the bursaries campaign is a good one and would in no way downgrade the activities of other SRC officers (at least as another SRC officer I'm buggered if I know how it would).

I look forward to the inevitable acid drop editorial comment after this diatribe type 1080 diorhea.

Toilet Humour

One day recently at I wandered through the Cotton building, it nearly came to past that I entered a door marked "Toilet-Men".

Being of the male gender this in it self would not have been unusual. However, alto marked on this door wat a large inscription asserting that "Staff Only" were to enter.

At tome point later (having found and used a convenient stairwell) I wat moved to ponder on what manner of beast these staff things are that are found immortalited upon toilet doors (on the outtide).

Some people who keep animals are known to have cat-dog doort attached to their abodes, to facilitate the passage of said types.

Could it then be that these staff things are some manner of University pet, housed, ted, and looked after by the students perhaps?

It then occured to me that at with Massey which has a student dog club, and Lincoln which has an all rams' ewe club, we here at Victoria are privileged to house on the third floor Rankine Brown, a Staff Club!

Many has been the hour when I have pondered at to the nature of the being performing before us at the bottom of the lecture hall, and now to know that it has been classified and indexed in the best scientific tradition, only brings a great burst of relief.

Now I wonder whether or not it could be arranged by the staff of this learned journal that its pages be opened to carry identikit pictures of the different breeds of staff. Outlining the harmless breeds (English Novel Lecturer 18th Centuary), and the not so harmless (Thomarse a Iaughus Legal Beagal), and so on.

Indeed perhaps over capping we could have the capping controller (who ever s/he is) organise a "staff show" so that we can all judge en masse the pedigree of this beast that inhabits toilets marked "staff only"

Immigration Preferences

The recent granting of permanent residence to Mr. Batho, son-in-law of the Prime Minister, clearly highlights the double standards adopted by the Immigration Department. Is Mr. Batho given a special treatment by the Immigration Department? How is it that overseas students from Asia and the Pacific Islands marrying New Zealand residents would have to wait for two years before they could apply for permanent residence, even though they have completed their degrees and have full-time employment? If overseas students from Asia and Pacific Islands 'marry for convenience', what about Mr. Batho? Mr. Batho came to New Zealand from South Africa on a temporary visitor's permit and is now a polytechnic student in Auckland.

Struggling to be Serious

This is in answer to your reply in a copy of "Salient" to a letter by one Vic Urwin. Unfortunately (in consequence) it's going to be a tremendously boring letter. Sorry to my fellow loonies, please forgive me this slight moment of sanity. I hate to be so serial, but well, you know. . . . C'est la vie.

Well Mr. typstr., Sir, let's get down to basics . . . You're crazy.

To trivialise the subject of Abortion (aghh . . . I dared to mention the word without being insulted, must be a quiet day) is typical of people unable to accept a straight-forward argument, let alone compose one.

Surely even you can see the difference between between Life inasmuch as the terms 'Foetus' and 'Sperm' are concerned? The former is alive (organically) and 'it' is also a 'result' of a fusion of two separate human being's genetical 'blueprints', whereas the latter is merely one of these 'genetical blueprints' as yet ununited with the 'other, half'. Hence it is Not a Human Being, whereas the Foetus is. Why is the Foetus a Human Being? Shit you Still can't see why?

Simple .... xx+xy = Human Being. Genetical Fact. You doubt it? O.K. . . ignore fact, see if I care. So what if it's two days, two weeks, two months, two years or two score years old? It's still xx and xy=Human Being. Fact. You want to also disbelieve that the Earth rotates about the Sun? Want to defy the Laws of Gravity without mechanical/artificial means? Want to pronounce to the world that you can prove that 2+3=2? If so, you're more weird than me (and that takes something).

Oh shit . . . you'll never listen to the facts anyway, so why should I waste my time on you soddy pimple-pickers.

The Right to Space

Your editorial March 20th raises two questions.

And as for the Christmas peace talks between Sadat and Begin, surely these can apply only to Egypt and Israel, Not to the whole Middle East?

Your editorial was, however, commendably brief, (hard put for space or just facts?) I noticed that the Salient Notes took up twice the room. Well done Simon!

A Downer on Labour

I read with interest the comments of "Dal I Larma" in Salient of March 27 on your political correspondent's view of the state of Kiwi politics.

It's about time to expose "Dal I Larma" as a tool of the media power clique presently occupying staff positions in the Labour Party. This person's comments are silly, silly, silly. They are just as bad as Wybrows latest verbal diahorrea over the leaking of information on labour's poor finances.

Your letter writer says "the correspondent shows his ignorance best in his attack on the labour Party and then goes on to give helpful support to Mick Connelly (a wanker from [unclear: work] back). Hell's teeth, why support dottering old fellows like Rowling, Connelly, Tizard etc.

Jeez. With this calibre of support around, no wonder Labour will be the next government. Wake up you little people. Be decent, nice and sensible like all good fuckwits who vote Labour.