Back To The Slaughterhouse: The second term has started and even as we write this column, Weir men are returning full of good resolutions and home cooking, to the familiar haunts. Those who are more far sighted and have heard the old College proverb: "First term—too early for work, second term—too cold, third term—too late," have brought back warm clothing. In fact we think that it would not be vergin' on the ridiculous to say that some who are wise already are trimming their lamps with an eye to finals.

Weir In Procesh

In the dark days before the lifting of the Council's ban on Procesh an Emergency Operations Committee was formed in Weir. Plans which would have done credit to a Stern Gang led by Heath Robinson were [unclear: Iaid.] One scheme for ringing a certain Councillor at intervals was considered and—we vouch for this—later discarded by Weir. But no action was taken until the final Council decision was made.

When the ban was lifted. "Operation Laurel" (remember Laurel, the cove who used to sling custard pies at Hardy?) was swung into action. Capping Eve was a dark and stormy night, and a hapless constabulary was out in force and warm overcoats. We don't know who was out to keep them amused, but we have heard that many on beat duty had a fruitless vigil . . . others were entertained by explosions in the Taj Mahals and Parliament Buildings in the city: some were so intrigued by an explosion outside the T.A.B. that they insisted on going in to look for burglars. . . . others again applied themselves diligently to removing notices and a certain road block, complete with detour signs . . . there was also a mighty explosion on the steps of the Central Police station—so the Police laundry staff informed our junior reporter. . . .

A great amount of effort was put into floats and Haka Party organisation. The Mau Mau battle and Clifton C. Fadiman welcome were schemes devised in Weir and lights in the Home burned undimmed throughout Thursday night as the banging of hammers and barely repressed expletives of the [unclear: frustrsted] poster staff went on incessantly, with only the occasional break for a little stimulant—coffee of course. Guy Powles (O.C.. Emergency Commitee), Terry Corbett. Rory O'Connor and Laurie Sinclair, were just a few of the stalwarts who worked unceasingly to ensure the success of Capping Day activities.

And the Procesh itself . . . well, you saw It. Your Weir reporters can only express the hope that next year Wellington's University may follow the lead given by Halsey's boys—and be permitted to process through the main streets of our City.

Sackcloth and Ashes: Apologies to one Boon who was quoted in this column last issue as winning the Varsity tennis title. Barry was runner up.

Extrav. and Capplcade: Weir provided no Haka Party this year to draw or drive the crowds into the Opera House owing to an unprecedented number of members going away for the vacation. Several, however, took part both front and backstage in one of the best Extravs for years. "Cappicade 1954 was extra good. We salaam to the editor, Ian (neither Sir Carol not Sir John) Rich.

Footnote: Our Jolly Rugger Weather—Pressure Chepps, pressure—On the Ball 'till the daylight flees—type of paragraph. The Weir football team has to date been a decided success. Drawn entirely from Weir, but—and we would emphasise this—playing first and foremost as a Varsity team for the Varsity Club, the Weir Wonders (you wonder how some of them have the nerve to appear in shorts), are at the present at the top of their grade. As yet unbeaten, this team is playing a brand of fast open football which might well be emulated in the higher grades. Inter-Fac' sprint champion, Q Almao, is at present top scorer, while G. C. (Give me a Comb) Harris must receive credit for much of the organisation. If you like entertaining football, we suggest you see these boys in action.

—J.D.—N.H.

A fine disregard for historical accuracy was shown by a member of the Otago Harbour Board at its monthly meeting recently. Referring to the plans of a portion of the board's equipment one member noted for his flowery descriptions, said: "They must have come out of the Ark when Noah soiled to discover America."