Extracts from Diary of Octavius Hadfield — Paihia, 1839
Extracts from Diary of Octavius Hadfield
Sept. 30 th . . . Left Waimate this afternoon, having taken leave of all there, and arrived here this evening. . . . The Committee have decided that I should go to Kapiti. I expect to start in about a fortnight. The Revd. Henry Williams purposes to accompany me. Oh that I had more dependence upon God.
Oct. 1st . . . Took a walk and had some conversation with the Revd. R. Taylor relative to the school and the Mission generally. Went with the Revd. Henry Williams to look after necessaries to take with me to Kapiti. I find that I can procure but little here. . . .
Oct. 2nd . . . Went early to Kororareka where the Revd. Henry Williams buried a child. Had some conversation with some persons over there, they desire to have a minister among them. Went to Mr. Busby's, dined with him and had some interesting conversation with him. Told him I could not support his proposal—school for half caste children upon the British and Foreign School Society's principles—he purposes altering his plan. . . .
Oct. 6th . . . Administered the Lord's Supper for the first time by myself, enjoyed a blessed feast. I wonder when I may meet with so many Christian friends around the Lord's Table. Expect to go shortly to Kapiti. Am this day 25 years old. Oh how little have I got done for the Glory of God.
Oct. 7th-8th . . . Almost all the morning engaged in talking about the concerns of the Mission and seeking information with respect to Kapiti. In the afternoon rode to Waimate with the Revd. William Williams. Slept at Mr. Wade's. . . . Left Waimate and rode to Pakaraka, dined there and came back to Paihia. Studied native a little.
Oct. llth-12th . . . Lost nearly all the morning. In the afternoon wrote to the Bishop and Mr. Coates. Believe I am going in the Columbine thus visiting Tauranga on our way. Went on board the Columbine and made some prepai-ations. Wrote some letters. Spent some time in uncertainty what to be doing. Read native.
Oct. 13th . . . Lord's Day. Went to Kororareka. Preached in morning on Peter 1, Chap. 3, Verse 18. . . .
Oct. 16th . . . Went to the Kerikeri with the Revd. William Williams to obtain more stores. Did not return till 10 o'clock. Felt wearied and unwell.
Oct. 17th . . . Engaged in making preparations for sailing. I employed some time in getting materials on board the Columbine for a future dwelling house.
Oct. 19th . . . Sent everything on board the vessel. Am now ready to start.page 154
Oct 21st . . . Engaged the greater part of the day in making preparations for my departure. Took leave of all friends and embarked on board the Columbine at 7 o'clock together with the Revd. H. Williams, Mr. Wilson, Mr. Clarke and Mr. Stack. Sailed out of the Bay of Islands with a fair wind, soon began to feel a little sea-sick. Retired to bed at about 12 o'clock after remaining on deck till I was very cold.
Oct. 22nd . . . Rose in the morning and went on deck. After remaining some time on deck during which time I felt very unwell I went below and retired to bed.
Oct. 23rd . . . Felt very unwell, however the wind continued fair and I lay patiently in bed, till I was told at a quarter past three o'clock that we had anchored at Tauranga. The wind blew very fresh as we entered the harbour and in a narrow part of the entrance the vessel was nearly drifting upon rocks, but the Lord preserved us. We landed at about 7 o'clock and were met upon the shore by the Revd. A. Brown and conducted by him to his house where we passed the evening—and retired to rest at Mr. Stack's not feeling very well but rejoicing that I was on shore.
Oct. 24th . . . Not very well. Have been engaged in doing nothing but looking round the settlement here. Much prefer the Christian simplicity of proceedings here to those in the northern stations.
Oct. 25th . . . Rose very unwell. Engaged in reading. Had some interesting conversation with Mr. Stack. If all is well am likely to proceed shortly to Kapiti. There is a body of about 1,000 natives in this neighbourhood who are set on mischief.
Oct. 27th . . . Attended the native service in the settlement. Gathered together a small English congregation at the Revd. Mr. Brown's, preached on Zech. 9, 9-11. Purposed going to a neighbouring Pa in the afternoon but was unable to get across the river for want of a boat.
Oct. 28th . . . Had intended accompanying the Revd. H. Williams and Brown and Mr. Clarke to Maketu where they are gone to endeavour to make peace between the Waikato and Rotorua natives, but did not feel well enough. Did but little all day, however I trust I am gaining information respecting my work.
Oct. 29th . . . Have been engaged almost all day in preparing prescriptions for medicines. Oh, while I feel anxious for the bodily health of the natives who may be under my care, may I above all seek their eternal health.
Oct. 30th . . . Passed the day in making various notes of matters which I thought might be useful. Intend starting tomorrow. Messrs. Williams, Brown and Clarke returned this evening from Maketu. They were nearly making peace. The Waikato natives were well disposed but the officious forwardness of the Ware Kura lads hindered it by representing to the Maketu natives that the others were afraid.page 155
Oct. 31st . . . Set sail about half past one o'clock from Tauranga after having taken leave of all friends there. Felt nothing of sea-sickness though not very comfortable as is usual with me on board ship.
Nov. 1st . . . Landed with Mr. Clarke at Motu some miles beyond Opotiki in the Bay of Plenty where we left the Christian natives, Samuel and Richard and their wives. The natives appeared savage but very civil and kind.
Nov. 2nd . . . Landed with Mr. Clarke and Mr. Stack at Warekaika in the forenoon about 20 miles from Waiapu, when after taking leave of them and procuring a little ballast and fire wood we set sail.
Nov. 4th . . . Fair wind, passed Turanga and the Mahia. Off the point of the Mahia we passed a rock a few feet under water, under our lee. It lay about 4 miles north east of the southern point of the head and about 5 miles E by N of the southern end of the island off the point. Felt thankful to the Lord for guiding me safely through these unsurveyed seas.
Nov. 5th . . . Sailed a little beyond Cape Turnagain having fresh breeze off the land.
Nov. 6th . . . Had foul wind all night and morning blowing hard, with rain. Went on deck in the afternoon for two hours, wind then fair, off Flat-point.
Nov. 7th . . . Wind fair. Rounded Cape Palliser in the forenoon and came to anchor in Port Nicholson at about 3 o'clock. This is a beautiful harbour having deep water and perfectly surrounded, being thus secure from all winds. About thirty natives came on board among whom was Dick from Waimate. It appears from their statements that the ship Tory has brought people from England who have bought this harbour and part of Rapid, etc., for a mere trifle. We purpose proceeding onwards tomorrow to the abode of Rauparaha, may the Lord be with us.
Nov. 8th . . . Wind not favourable for leaving this place. Not at all well during the night and forenoon, my chest very painful. In the afternoon, went on shore for two hours. Found some plants which do not grow at the northern part of the Island. Came on board somewhat better. Believe this is not Port Nicholson but that that harbour lies round the next point. This is however a beautiful port.
Nov. 9th . . . Suffered considerable pain in my chest during the night. We got under way early in the morning, but as the wind soon headed us we ran away from Cloudy Bay. We anchored there about one o'clock not being able to beat against a strong wind nor did we get into the proper anchorage. A Portuguese who has a whaling establishment came on board a few hours after and though it rained and blew much we beat into a safe anchorage. We could not form a correct notion of the place from the badness of the weather.
Nov. 10th . . . Lord's Day. I rose rather better in health but not well. Revd. Henry Williams went on shore to hold service with a party of nativespage 156
and English, and after I had had service on board and preached from John 3, 14-15, I went on shore to the party of English who were with the Portuguese. It was a miserable place and the men looked in a deplorable condition, spiritually. They assembled for service to the number of about twenty, and having read prayers I preached from John 3, 30. Some appeared attentive and one or two applied for the New Testament. The wind blew so hard that I and the master of the vessel were detained on shore for two hours, but as the wind abated a little and we had a good whaleboat and good hands we put off and after taking some water in, we arrived safe on board.
Nov. 11th . . . Rose early purposing to go to Queen Charlotte Sound to see Colonel Wakefield who has been out here purchasing land, but we heard that the Tory had sailed for Taranaki. Went on shore, find that they have made a kind of nominal purchase of land not having been over it to define boundaries or having consulted all parties. Was pleased with the many enquiries for books, both native and English, but was unable to supply many. We got under way in the afternoon but were obliged to anchor again, early in the morning—but as the wind soon drew ahead we went into Port Nicholson and anchored there in the afternoon (12th).
Nov. 13th . . . Determined to leave the Columbine and go overland to Kapiti. The Revd. Henry Williams and I started with about 10 natives in the morning. We landed at a small Pa on Richard's (a native from Waimate) ground and drew a plan of it. Saw two native chapels which have been lately built but which are standing on ground which is now sold— went from thence to another Pa and after some conversation with the natives, we had prayers and Mr. Williams addressed them and then went to bed.
Nov. 14th . . . Suffered all night from a severe attack of asthma which obliged me to sit up in my bed. At the dawn of day I fell off to sleep and had rest for about an hour. I had serious thoughts of returning to the vessel, having suffered such extreme pain in the night and feeling very great oppression still in my chest. But after prayer for Divine guidance and for strength determined to start on my journey, as I rather feared remaining in Port Nicholson having felt considerable pain in my chest on my former stay there. We started at 9 in the morning and walked all day with slight intervals of rest, through a thick and hilly forest. I suffered much pain in my chest but did not feel tired and we arrived at a convenient resting place after having crossed 14 rivers at about 6 o'clock, when, my tent being pitched and having eaten some potatoes, I retired to rest. I seemed to be supported beyond my expectation all the way.
Nov. 15th : . . Rose in the morning much refreshed by a night's rest, free from that distressing pain arising from asthma. Oh, how forgetful am I of the manifold blessings I receive and how much the days of health have hitherto exceeded my days of sickness. Some natives who accompanied us having gone in the evening to Mangarautawiri, a Pa opposite the Island of Mana, early in the morning some natives arrived from there with food and page 157 a message from the chief Rangitakaroro requesting us to go over to see him and his people. We went there after breakfast passing through a wood for about 3 miles. It lies on a small point on the shore. After speeches from the chief and others, in the evening we had prayers and Mr. Williams addressed them. They have for some time been in the habit of having prayers (since the arrival of Richard). I was much pleased with the disposition of the natives to attend at least externally to Divine things.
Nov. 16th . . . Left the Pa in the morning and went with the chief in a large canoe with about 60 persons to Mana. It is an island situated about 2 miles from the land, about 3 miles long and two wide, some hundred feet high and quite flat. There are sheep and cattle grazing on it. The natives of the Pa have lately also had service morning and evening. The chief, however, Rangihaeata, is opposed to the Gospel. He is the person who formerly accompanied Rauparaha to the southward in the Elizabeth, when acts of the greatest treachery and atrocity were committed by them. We remained there some hours, and they supplied our natives with abundance of food. On leaving the chief said that since he had seen Mr. Williams he would attend to the Gospel. We left the Island in the afternoon in a canoe and went to Hongoeka, a small Pa on the mainland about 5 miles from Mana. There were but few natives there. I retired early to rest. The wind blew and it rained hard but my tent was comfortable.
Nov. 17th . . . Lord's Day. Rose early in the morning and after a sweet season of prayer went to Mr. William's tent. Had prayers and breakfasted there as usual. He then started to a Pa about 3 miles distant. I remained in the Pa. The natives assembled and George, a Ngapuhi native, read prayers and gave a good discourse. We then had school and I was much delighted with the attention of the natives and more especially with the earnestness and beauty with which the native Christian enforced on his countrymen the blessedness of receiving and believing the glorious truths of the Gospel.
Nov. 18th . . . Left Hongoeka at 4.30 in the morning and after a rough walk of about five miles came to Pukerua where we remained some time with the natives and had breakfast. They were desirous of obtaining books. We then proceeded and passed Paripari, Wainui, Tipapa, Wareroa, Waremoku and Taurui and then arrived at Waikanae about 6 having walked about 15 miles, the latter part of our road being hard sandy beach. The natives are at war, only acting on the defensive. They met for prayers as soon as we arrived, when the Revd. H. Williams addressed them—there were near a thousand present. It was an interesting sight and I lifted up my heart to God with feelings of gratitude and prayed that His blessing may come down upon them. . . .
Nov. 19th . . . Rose early. About 9 o'clock the chiefs began to speak. Moturoa, a very pleasing interesting chief of Port Nicholson began, and was followed by the old chief of the place Reretawhangawhanga—others spoke in succession. About 2 o'clock crossed over to Kapiti, to the place where Rauparaha lives. He was sitting in state ready to receive us. He certainly page 158 looked more like a chief than any man I have yet seen. He listened very attentively to what was said and appeared much interested in the Gospel message. He has been one of the most bloodthirsty men in the land. May the Lord have mercy upon him. We had prayers with him and the natives there and went on board the Atlas for the night, Captain Mayhew's ship, being invited by him.
Nov. 20th . . . The wind blew so hard in the morning that we could not leave the ship. Wrote letters to Mr. Wilson, Ford and Wade. In the afternoon went on shore and spent some time with Rauparaha but had little time for private reading and prayer. Not very well.
Nov. 21st . . . We slept on board and went early to a flat point of land on the island of Kapiti. Saw a few natives, met some Englishmen at a Whaling Station belonging to Mr. Jones. Several of them with the foreman at their head treated us with great insolence. May the Lord have mercy on them and give them light. Visited another party who were civil and well behaved. In the afternoon went and saw Rauparaha. Purpose leaving in the morning— had some interesting conversation with a young American.
Nov. 22nd . . . Rose early in the morning, had my horses safely brought over in a large canoe to Waikanae—we came across in my boat. After some conversation with the natives went up the river. Walked over the ground where the late battle took place among the natives. Saw the place where they buried 31 of the Ngatiraukawa. Walked some hours. There are many acres of land covered with grass, wheat, barley and oats mixed togedier, and fine trees. After prayers with the natives, etc., retired to rest.
Nov. 23rd . . . Did not start early to Otaki on account of the rain. Left Waikanae about 9 o'clock and walked on a sandy beach for about 11 miles, till we arrived at a small Pa near Otaki called Pakakutu, where we stopped on account of the rain, being wet. There is here a large flat piece of land, well watered and abounding with wild ducks. After prayers had some conversation with the chief of the Pa, Ruru and some others. They trace die war to an act of indiscretion on the part of Paul, a Wesleyan lad at Waikanae. Some appear still disposed for war. The chief who cannot yet read repeated the evening church service having learnt it orally. Here they have had no instruction but that of a few volunteer natives. Oh may the Lord pour out his Spirit upon them and upon me, that I may come among them with the fullness of the blessing of the Gospel of Peace.
Nov. 24th . . . Lord's Day. We walked with the natives of the small Pa, Pakakutu, to Rangiuru, the large Pa of Otaki, and then had Divine service. There were about 600 or 700 present. I was gratified to see so many present as I had been led to understand that most of the inhabitants of this place were disposed to reject the Gospel. We afterwards had school and I was surprised to find many acquainted with the catechisms we have in use. May the Lord look down to bless this people, and may my soul be refreshed with peace and may I be endowed with wisdom to fit me for the work in which I am engaged.page 159
Nov. 25th . . . Moved from the small Pa to Rangiuru about 9 o'clock. They do not appear very desirous of peace—they will go tomorrow to arrange about it. Did not leave the Pa. Many of the natives here are disinclined to attend to the Gospel, some on the other hand are very attentive. The sons of the chief Watanui, Roha and Haua, are interesting, enquiring young men and can read a little. There were not many present at evening prayers. Oh may I be directed by the Lord as to where I should reside and how I should proceed.
Nov. 26th . . . Spent the day at Rangiuru, went about looking for a site for a small cottage to reside in occasionally. Much pleased with the young men, Roha and Haua, they are the most interesting young people I have yet seen. Felt sometimes discouraged at the apparent apathy of the people, but remembered that as a missionary it is my work to break up barren ground.
Nov. 27th . . . Went with H.W. to a small Pa about 5 miles distant called Waikawa, where there was a small chapel, and then on to another about 2 miles distant called Ohau, to endeavour to make peace. The people here are very ignorant. One man very urgent for a book. Not very well, retired early to rest.
Nov. 28th . . . Left Ohau and returned to Rangiuru, about 6 miles, road very good at low water. Was much interrupted by natives while endeavouring to read in my tent. Walked out to look for a site for a house, fixed on one that I think will do. The people here are not very attentive—but few only assemble for prayers.
Nov. 29th-30th . . . Continued till about 3 o'clock in the Pa then left the Pa to proceed with the natives towards Waikanae to endeavour to establish peace. The mob of natives soon joined us—having had prayers with them we left them and proceeded for about 4 miles, when, it being very dark and raining we stopped and having managed to pitch my tent in the sand, Mr. Williams and myself lay from about ten o'clock till 3, when the mob consisting of about 200 natives with Watanui at their head, joined us. They requested us to have prayers with them. We then proceeded all together after they had gone through several native manoeuvres. They remained about two miles from the Pa. We entered it and after some speeches they determined to establish peace. Matahau was sent out with conditions of peace and the hostile mob returned. The natives of Waikanae in the afternoon went through various military exercises.
Dec. 1st . . . Received the Lord's Supper with several of our natives. The congregation both in the morning and the evening consisted of about 900 In the evening they were particularly attentive when addressed by the Revd. Henry Williams on the last verses of Matthew's Gospel. I was much interested with the school. May the Lord be with us and pour his spirit on these people.
Dec. 2nd . . . Have suffered the last three days with a severe complaint in my bowels, from living entirely upon vegetable food. Went to Kapiti— page 160 procured several things from Captain Mayhew for our trip to Wanganui, as the Columbine had not yet arrived. About 100 natives met in the evening for instruction. It was on Mr. D's plan from Waimate—I did not like it. I shall stop it. Looked about for a spot for a house.
Dec. 3rd . . . Not well. Remained all day at Waikanae. Walked with Matahau to look for a place for a house. Did not see any suitable place. Mr. W. addressed the natives (about 900). Sat up late talking to Mr. W.
Dec. 4th . . . Still unwell. Assembled in the chapel and Matahau was baptised by Mr. W. and called Joseph. He is not well instructed having been a long time from the ministry of the Gospel, but is evidently dependent entirely on die blood of Jesus for pardon and his conduct is in every respect consistent with the profession that he makes. By him undoubtedly as the instrument all the good there is here has been effected. Witnessed the purchase of some land situated beyond Port Nicholson for natives, and also Richard's at Port Nicholson for the use of the mission. Left Waikanae proposing to proceed to Wanganui as the Columbine had not yet arrived. Reached Otaki, felt very unwell. Went to bed as soon as my tent was pitched.
Dec. 5th . . . Suffered all night from violent pains and asthma. Went about 3 in the morning to Mr. W's tent and took about 50 drops of laudanum and a little rhubarb, felt a little relieved. Made an attempt about noon to get up but was unwell. Determined, having no particular end in view, not to proceed to Wanganui. Propose proceeding when I have books. Mr. W. left about 2 o'clock on his way through the country. Continued suffering continual pain all day.
Dec. 6th . . . Felt rather better this morning. Left my tent about 11 and sat with Watanui and his son and wife in the warm sunshine. Returned and sat in my tent reading, etc., for some hours. Went to evening service, very few natives assembled. Felt cold in returning, which was soon followed by violent pain. Took about 49 drops of laudanum and went to bed.
Dec. 7th . . . Very unwell all day. Took more laudanum and a little rhubarb (the only medicine I have with me), remained in bed all day. Somewhat annoyed by the ignorant curiosity of the natives. Captain Mayhew and Brown came to see me. The wind blew so hard in the night that I was obliged to go out and fasten my tent, was in fear lest it should be carried away. Have nothing to eat but boiled flour, biscuit and water, nevertheless feel thankful and satisfied.
Dec. 8th . . . Lord's Day. Felt somewhat better all day, but unable to move from my bed, somewhat annoyed by the rude noisy behaviour of the natives. Received a letter from my dear brother Charles, of May 6th. Thereby I learnt that all were well at home up to that time. Felt thankful. . . . Felt desirous to pray for the poor people among whom I live, and among whom I hope to spend my few remaining days. . . .
Dec. 9th . . . Felt much better. Determined for many reasons to leave Otaki and go to Waikanae. Started with three natives about 10, and after some page 161 time in the rain, and much fatigue, I reached it, at least a quiet spot just by. I had some boiled flour for my dinner, and sat over a fire talking with natives. Heard that the Columbine had just arrived. . . .
Dec. 11th . . . Went early to the Pa. There were some Englishmen there, in trouble because having uttered an oath the day before, the chief Witi detained their boat. The chief would not attend to anything they said, but went with me to the Columbine at Kapiti. Captain Lewington says that he has met with very bad weather—went on shore and looked after my things. Felt still very unwell—took a strong dose of castor oil and went to bed on board at about 6 o'clock.
Dec. 12th . . . Passed a good night, felt better. Arranged matters and left the Columbine. As soon as I landed the men came to me and asked me to intercede for the boat. I spoke to the chief and for a slight payment he allowed the boat to go. Fixed on a spot in the Pa, for a site for a house for the present. The natives are very civil and disposed to assist me in any manner. . . .
Dec. 13th . . . My health a little improved, walked about noon towards Waikanae. Stopped and talked with many small parties of natives. Learnt that a man had been murdered at Otaki—he was the brother of Joseph, and was murdered by Tuatara. Continued a short time in the Pa. Saw a few preparations for my house. On account of the extreme heat of the sun, went for a few hours into a native house and was covered with vermin. Felt my soul somewhat drawn towards God in thought and prayer, feel ready to endure anything for the honour and glory of Christ in His service; though dwelling in a tent among these people with whose language I am still unacquainted I would not change my lot with any person in the world.
Dec. 14th . . . Came early to the Pa and took up my abode with the chief Witi (son of the old chief Reretawhangawhanga) who is extremely civil. Occupied in various arrangements, also in studying the language. . . .
Dec. 15th . . . Lord's Day. The service was conducted in the morning by Cranmer, the Christian native who accompanied me. Afterwards we had school. In the evening I for the first time read the native service. Simon, a Christian native gave an address from Col. 3, 1-3 in a very able manner. Before service for several reasons I felt rather in low spirits. A Wesleyan lad Paul has set up an opposition service in the Pa, etc., etc., but during the service and even before when I saw the natives crowding to the chapel till many were obliged to stand and many to remain outside, I looked up with thankfulness to the Lord and gave thanks. . . .
Dec. 16th . . . Rose at half past four in the morning and began school in the Pa after service. The sight was indeed pleasing. There were about 180 men and boys engaged in four different classes in learning to write on slates. We have but four able to teach. It was indeed interesting to see the old chief Reretawhangawhanga beginning to learn to write and read, and others as old. I have not yet derived a plan for the women, there were about 150 of them, but having no teachers or slates, they were instructed only in the page 162 catechisms. Oh that I had help here. I trust shortly to get the school into good order. Went after breakfast over to Kapiti and brought more slates. Old Rauparaha came and attacked me and said that I had forsaken him and carried all my things to the other side. I gave him a testament and some small books. He used bad language and intimated to me that if I did not supply all his wants he would not favour the Gospel and that many would be influenced and guided by him. He stated moreover that he would stir up another attack upon Waikanae. In fact I was much disgusted with him and must be civil to him on account of his great influence, but I can now see into his character and shall know how far to trust him.
Dec. 17th . . . Went to school at 5 o'clock. The numbers have increased since yesterday, but I have not yet sufficiently ascertained their knowledge to classify them. Was much pleased and delighted with it. After breakfast rode to Otaki on the hard sandy beach and carried a few books in my pocket. Went first to Pakakutu, and was much pleased with the chief Ruru to whom I gave a testament and some small books. He appeared very grateful. He is I trust really drawn to spiritual things. I then went to Rangiuru and sat for an hour and a half with Watanui and his sons. I gave him and each of his sons a book. I learnt from some notes to natives that Mr. Williams was at Rangitikei, having met a party of natives coming from Taranaki to join these people. He remained there and persuaded them to return. I rode back to Waikanae.
Dec. 19th . . . Attended school at 5 in the morning, 230 adults present, 182 males, 48 females. Having only 5 teachers these are all that I could manage. It is an interesting sight to see persons of all ages learning to read the Word of God, the only book they have. Passed the day principally in attending to the sick and writing and studying the language. Have felt better in health today and yesterday. Oh Lord make me grateful for all Thy favour I pray Thee. Wrote to dear Charles by way of America. Had a visit from a surgeon living in the neighbourhood.
Dec. 20th . . . No school on account of the rain. Engaged a considerable part of die day in attending the sick. I fear to little profit as they will not attend to directions. Not very well. May my soul and body be strengthened by the Lord for the work he may be pleased to entrust to me.
Dec. 21st . . . Attended school in the morning as usual. Went after breakfast to Paripari (and also Wainui) and carried books—it is about 8 miles distant. The people were very civil. Attended to three sick persons. Richard's brother I hope will recover. It is 12 months today since I arrived in New Zealand. Oh how unprofitably I have hitherto spent my time. Do Thou oh gracious God have mercy and compassion upon me and grant that I may live more in communion with Thee, and seek grace and strength to enable me to do Thy will. Bless O Lord the people among whom I am now come.