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Typo: A Monthly Newspaper and Literary Review, Volume 5
[miscellaneous paragraphs]
The new Ministry, while dismissing valuable public officers—some of whom they have been obliged to reinstate—have not swept away the so-called audit department. It is worse than useless—a costly sham, and has been for years the laughing-stock of the civil service.
A coincidence has been noticed in connexion with the census returns of Oamaru. The number of houses in the town is returned as 1111, and the number of acres inside the town boundary is also 1111. There is thus exactly one house per acre in the borough.
To the distinguished scientist, Dundreary, is due the discovery of the reason why the dog wags his tail— « becauthe he ith the thtronger of the two. » Since the formation of the present ministry, New Zealand has had a good illustration of the converse phenomenon. The tail, being the stronger, has most perversely persisted in wagging the dog.
The Melbourne Typographical Society now numbers in its ranks a member of Parliament—the popular Secretary, Mr John Hancock, having been returned to the Victorian Parliament for the Collingwood seat, rendered vacant by the death of Mr Langridge, who at the time of his decease held the portfolio of Colonial Secretary. Mr Hancock has always been a prominent labor leader, and held a responsible place on the control and finance committee during the late strike. He was also President of the Melbourne Trades Council. He is a good public speaker and of good presence, and may be expected to make his mark in the house.
The awful rubbish that sometimes appears in newspaper correspondence columns would almost justify the conclusion that editors do not read this department—nor need any one blame them, had they no responsibility in the matter. It is, however, going a little too far to give currency to a letter suggesting the guillotine as the proper thing for capitalists and landowners. We would like to see the portrait of the cropped-headed ruffian (he playfully describes himself as an « ignorant brute ») who wrote the letter. It is needless to add that he was not man enough to put his name to it. He is, we should say, a fit subject, not for the instrument he recommends, but for the Cat.
The latest novelty in the newspaper line (says a contemporary) is one published entirely by the inmates of a State Prison in South Dakota, United States. The journal is issued every Saturday, and contains such interesting items as the pedigrees of the various criminals contained within its walls, besides various events of prison life. The subscription to the periodical is somewhat unique, consisting, as it does, of half a pound of tobacco.—We are not sure that this is quite a novelty. We are under the impression that several such papers have been published at intervals for some years in America. Prisoners in the United States possess privileges quite unknown in the British dominions.
Since our paragraph about the late Mr John Baldwin and the Gisborne defalcations was written, we have had a letter from a well-informed correspondent giving some facts not generally known. He says: « It has leaked out that Baldwin's information as to the state of the Harbor Board accounts was obtained from a junior clerk in the office, who was dismissed for asking for an increase of salary, and soon afterwards left the colony. All the years that the irregularities have been going on the books were audited (?) by a general government officer, and the secretary had the highest reputation for integrity and ability….. Baldwin, on his deathbed, told, with intense indignation, of the way in which he, an innocent man, had been herded with criminals of the vilest type. He was not a squeamish man, and it was not at the incarceration itself that he felt aggrieved; but at its horrible associations. He said, 'I never spent such an awful time in my life.' »
Mr John Corlett, proprietor of the Sporting Times, tells a good story. Some time ago a number of gentlemen formed themselves into a limited company for the purpose of carrying on a newspaper. The venture did not succeed, and at a meeting of directors the chairman stated the position of the company. There was at the bank a balance of £300, which was sufficient for a few days, and no more. The Chairman had received a « good tip » about a horse for the Derby. The animal was an outsider, and if the £300 were « put on » there would be a return, in the event of success, of £10,000, which would float the paper into prosperity again; whereas, if he lost, the paper would stop only two or three days earlier than it otherwise would. The solicitor to the company was sent for, and his hair was made to stand on end by his being asked, whether under the articles of association and the Companies Acts, they would be justified in putting £300 of the shareholders' money on a horse for the Derby.
It is not often that we agree with Mr George Fisher, M.H.R.; but in the following protest, which he publishes in the Evening Press, all lovers of fair play will join. Most damaging charges, at present un-authenticated, and some since proved to be false, have been made against the Public Trust Office, and widely circulated by means of the press agencies. Mr Fisher says: « All we know at present is that certain newspaper ghouls have been permitted to sit down in the Premier's office and dive up to the elbows in the congenial work of picking out such evidence as would be best calculated to create a public scandal and destroy all belief in the honor and honesty of our public institutions. Three men in the public service were hurried to their graves by these newspaper ghouls—need we sacrifice more men to the literary ghoul? The Public Trust Office Commission was appointed to enquire into the administration of the Public Trust Office. Is there as yet any report from the Commissioners upon the subject of their enquiry? I applied to the Commissioners for a copy of the evidence taken by the Commission, and was informed that it could not be furnished to me. Is it possible, then, that what is free and open to the newspaper ghoul is not open to a member of Parliament? Whatever may have been wrong in the administration of the Public Trust Office will have to be answered for in Parliament by the Ministerial head of the Department; and when the proper time arrives, and when I am in possession of the evidence—not the ghoul's version—I will endeavor to see that the saddle is put on the right horse. »