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Typo: A Monthly Newspaper and Literary Review, Volume 4

[miscellaneous paragraphs]

The Auckland Star has discovered that economical administration is impossible so long as Wellington remains the seat of government. To indicate the Star's remedy would be superfluous.

Messrs Whitcombe & Tombs are, we believe, the only publishers of schoolbooks specially prepared for the colony, and have produced a full series at the cost of much labor and expense. The suggestions of the Trades and Labor Council, if adopted, would at once exclude these books from the public schools. Is this resolution intended to advance the cause of education? or merely to create work for the unemployed? or to injure an obnoxious firm by destroying the value of their copyrights?

It is startling to find the following in a leader in the London Daily Telegraph. The ignorance is the less excusable as one of the editors not long ago showed some acquaintance with the Australian Handbook. « Australia is a large island or continent, with central deserts and a colonized coast. There are no transcontinental railways, as in America; every delegate who joined in the Federation Conference came by sea in a coasting steamer. This characteristic of the new land makes common naval defence absolutely essential to safety. Were a foreign foe to attack South Australia it would be necessary for New South Wales and Victoria, the nearest colonies, to send assistance by sea. Short cuts by land across the waste expanse may be eventually developed; but at present the new nation will be, in fact, a fringe of States along the coast of a vast expanse of central uninhabited territory,»

The Manawatu Herald quotes as follows from the local school inspector's report:— « Pronunciation of names in the colony should receive more attention from several teachers. For instance, that 'ang' in Wanganui, Tauranga, &c, is pronounced by them like ang in 'hang,' seems very curious. » The Herald thinks that the critic should have gone farther and indicated how the vowel should be sounded. Does he adopt the vulgar pronunciation, which turns the a into the o in « song »? The a is the same as in « Rangiora » —longer than the English vowel in « hang, » and not quite so long as the a in « far. » The g is commonly mispronounced. In the Maori the ng is always inseparable, and is very commonly an initial sound. In divisions of words this is often overlooked by the comp. « Tau-ra-nga » is the proper division—not « Tau-ran-ga. » The Herald pertinently asks why, if the Inspector stands up for correctness, he falls into the common error of dropping the h from « Whanganui. »

To write police-court reports on the model of nursery rhymes is an innovation attempted by the Manawatu Standard. This is an example: « There was an old boozer, John Boyle, who filled up with fusel oil. For more did he hunger, but Tony Isemonger his nice little game did spoil. So the Beak severe, in seclusion drear ordered poor Jack to linger. For seven long days he must not raise to his lips his little finger.—Benjamin Harrison drew a comparison 'twixt the known merits of whisky and ale. But 't was embarrassin'— mixing was harassin'. Benny was lugged by the cop to the gaol. Then said Mr Snelson: 'You will do well, son, always to keep from the liquor away. As this is your first, and I hope your last, burst, 't is only five shillings I '11 ask you to pay.—William Nicholl got in a pickle, drinking of Pascoe's beer. The fine was five shillings, which Billy was willing to plank and get away clear.—Johnny Boil, who of fusel oil took many a dose last night, was asked by Dean if he had not been the least little wee bit tight. Johnny confesed and said he was blest with a thirst he could not appease, so the Colonel frowned and fined him two pound, or seven days' rest and ease. »

The cable messages are still a comedy of errors. A Melbourne telegram stated that Sydney and Melbourne had allotted zones for photographic work in connexion with a chart of the heavens. One paper came out with the version that the « lithographic » work in connexion with a chart of the heavens had been allotted to « Mr Jones. » A home telegram read simply « Obituary: Edward Lloyd. » Some of our contemporaries published obituary paragraphs relating to Edward Lloyd, of Lloyd's Weekly; others understood it to refer to the noted vocalist. It is when foreign phrases are « wired » that the oddest misconceptions arise. For example, Bismarck was reported to have said he roi me reverra (The king will see me again.) One version in a North Island paper was: « M. Le Boi and M. Biverra have joined the French Cabinet. » Still farther north Prince Bismarck's utterance was made to read Le roi, il rève. This would literally mean, « The king, he dreams, » but the editor translated the phrase, and gave the word its English meaning— « The king raves! » This translation, though not idiomatic, is not, however, quite as outrageous as it appears. « Rave » and « reverie » are derived from the same root.

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