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Typo: A Monthly Newspaper and Literary Review, Volume 3

[miscellaneous paragraphs]

Among the Parliamentary Papers just to hand is a return of Government advertising for the year ending 30th September, 1887, moved for by Mr Buchanan. The return as laid on the table specified the names of papers and amounts paid to each; but the printed return is (very properly) confined to a summary, occupying two foolscap pages. The total amount for the year is £9,691 17s 1d. As the return was ordered on the 10th November, 1887, it appears to have been an extraordinary time in hand. Its preparation cost £25, and the printing, £1 3s.

The local Standard records that « a young man is about to lay claim to a £250 house, and an orchid at Rangiora—the house being built on a section which he holds the title-deed for, and he also holds the title for the section of the orchid. » —For telegram blunders a Napier comp holds the belt. In Georgio's account of the assassination of General Gordon, he was made to say that « Gordon was sneaking round the balcony of the seraglio » —the correct version being « smoking on the veranda. » —A mixed metaphor of singular beauty was worked off by a member of a North Island education board who complained that endeavors were being made « to shunt a teacher by a side-wind. » —A Reefton paper, in a leader, refers sarcastically to « the ridiculous paradise of what is called by courtesy the Victorian Fleet. » —An East Coast paper tells of an old settler whose life, in the time of bygone native troubles, was more than once « saved by the meditation of friendly natives. » —Referring to the delay in connexion with a recent judicial appointment, a contemporary says:— « A judge of the Supreme Court holding his position on the surface of the Government is a grave misfeasance. » —A Dunedin coroner's jury has been guilty of a « bull » in the following curious verdict:— « That the infant was found drowned, but whether it was born alive or dead there is no evidence to show. » —A writer in an Auckland religious weekly attributes the passage « It is more blessed to give than to receive » to « our own great prophet—the Bard of Avon » !!