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Typo: A Monthly Newspaper and Literary Review, Volume 2
[trade dispatches]
Another copy of the monstrous proposed tariff of the protection « delegates » has reached us—this time as an irregular parliamentary paper, H 10, « laid on the table by the Hon G. Fisher, with the leave of the House. » The cost of printing, as we find from the note at the end, was £5 4s—another misapplication of public money.
It is said to be customary in some communities to « 'eave 'arf a brick » at strangers when they make their appearance. In the little town of Fielding they are evidently regarded in no kindly spirit. The local paper, in narrating how, through corporation neglect, several persons one dark night fell into a dangerous pitfall and were « much bruised, besides being dreadfully alarmed, » adds that they were « fortunately only strangers who are not ratepayers in the borough »!
« The richest man in New Zealand, » says a late home paper, « is John Jones, who commenced life as an oarsman on a ferry. He is a native, is now resident at Dunedin, and amassed his millions by steamboat building. This is one more proof of the facilities for industrious men to rise from poverty at the antipodes.! » It might have added that Mr Jones is so modest and retiring withal, that no one in the colony knows anything about him.
A Napier newspaper, making merry to the extent of nearly a column over the « ignorance » of a contemporary as evidenced by some errors of the press, perpetrated a characteristic blunder of its own. Its rival had written that a certain gentleman had been instant in season and out of season. This, said the critic, should have read « 'constant'—which is sense—the other expression, 'instant,' was nonsense »! The writer evidently knew so little of his mother-tongue as to be unaware that « instant » is correctly used as an adjective, and so little of the Scriptures as to be unaware that the « nonsense » was a literal quotation from the apostle Paul, so familiar as to have passed into a proverb.
Up to the last moment the ministry could not agree upon their revenue proposals, and the result was that their hastily-drawn tariff as brought down, contained some extraordinary errors, which had afterwards to be amended by leave of the House. Methylated spirits (hitherto duty-free) were taxed 15s instead of 1s per gallon, and a duty of « £20 the lb » was levied on every pound of brooms and brushes, of buckets and tubs, of mantelpieces, wire mattresses, fancy goods and toys, fireworks and magic lanterns; a duty of « £15 the lb » on every pound of « bellows, except forge; » and a duty of « £25 the lb » on every pound of furniture, upholstery, and cabinet-ware. The « lb » was amended to « per cent ad valorem. »