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Typo: A Monthly Newspaper and Literary Review, Volume 1

"Quotations."

page 38

"Quotations."

« Where are you going to, my pretty maid? »
« I'm going to publish, sir, » she said.
« Perhaps you've a fortune, my pretty maid? »
« My verse is my fortune, sir, » she said.
« Then you'd better not try it, my pretty maid. There's an item for Printing; and when it is paid, there's Commission on Sales, oh, innocent maid! In your rural retreat have you heard of The Trade?—Oh, where are you going to, my pretty maid? »

It was a printer who made Henderson, N.C., the largest city, territorially speaking, in the world. The intention was to extend the limit 1,000 yards in each direction, but the printer made the bill read 1,000 miles, and so it passed the American Legislature without the error being noticed.

A merchant, alone in a desolate store,
Sang « Willow, tit-willow, tit-willow! »
I said to him, « Why are you pacing the floor,
Singing « Willow, tit-willow, tit-willow? »
« Alas! » he replied, as he smothered his cries,
« I thought it was nonsense to advertise
And now I've no custom at all but the flies,
Oh, willow, tit-willow, tit-willow! »

A settler named Cziglelewski has been naturalized. It has been found impossible to naturalize his name.

In the good old times in Wellington, « Old Smith » of Thorndon Flat, had the mysterious words vide et crede placed over his shop door. This phrase was freely and popularly translated « No credit here. »

According to the Philadelphia Call, a shorthand writer at Washington can report a speech with such rapidity that the speaker finds it utterly impossible to keep up with him.