A Summing of Summer.

Christmas is Summer's white pants—a sign of seasonal salubrity and a salute to insobriety; for who is really sober in the summer? The sun is Nature's intoxicant, the ideal inebriant, and the only ale with a “kick” that breaks no bones.

There are other signs of summer. Only yesterday I noted the loud shriek of a backless bathing suit calling to the female beach-comber or brine-soaked lady-bird, from the depths of the plate-glass glades of Gladrags. Also, there are signs that the straw cady, so long absent from our shores, has reappeared in our midst. The straw cady, or rolling road-reveller, was once a common sight perching on the branches of our hat-racks and hall stands, slightly dishevelled after a day of flying to and fro about the roads and hedgerows of Wellington. But its natural foe, the Flying Squash-wabbler, or Tyred Tiddler, drove it from our shores.

Father Xmas Travels By Rail

Now it has returned we may expect a hot time this summer. In any case, it is a sign that summer may be expected to simmer. How true it is that a “straw” shews which way the wind blows.

For men of muscle, brown and braw,
There's nothing like a hat of straw.
It's light, and keeps the “boko” shady—
The straw commemorable “cady,”
You wear it either straight or “gay,”
It looks distinguished either way.
Its easy, when you meet a lady,
To raise a straw-constructed “cady.”
In fact, in case she should ignore you,
The wind will often raise it for you.
A straw invariably shews
Which way the wind at present blows.
In fact, the “cady” made of straw,
Is oft “not dead but gone before.”
At Christmas it's especially handy
For serving soup, or even “shandy,”
At picnic parties of the sort
Where crockery is always short.

The Sun-burnt Boko or Skinned Beak also has made an early appearance this year. Several have been seen displaying their tomato-like peal. The Sun-baked Boko must not be confused with the Sozzled Conk, for although they are of similar hue, they are birds of a different feather. The one derives its name from sizzling in sun, and the other from sozzling in rum. Other unnatural phenomena peculiar to summer are the Eskimo Pie-per or Arctic Tonsil-teaser, the Blazer or Striped-coated Swank, and the Picnic-party or Sand Swallow. Seeing that we are agreed that summer is to be or not to be, according to the weather, we will cease to simmer, and wish a good Christmas dinner to all.