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The New Zealand Railways Magazine, Volume 3, Issue 3 (July 2, 1928)

Schoolboy Howlers

Schoolboy Howlers.

All the world, except the United States, lies in the temperance zone.

The sun never sets on the British Empire, because the Empire is in the East and the sun sets in the West.

Henry VIII. was very cruel to Anne Boleyn and ironed her. (The history said “He pressed his suit on her.”)

Shakespeare lived at Windsor with his merry wives.

The king wore a scarlet robe trimmed with vermin.

Wolsey saved his life by dying on his way from York to London.

After twice committing suicide, Cowper lived till 1800, when he died a natural death.

Barbarians are things put into bicycle wheels to make them run smoothly.

A Soviet is a cloth used by waiters in hotels (a serviette).

* * *

Mary had a little lamb,
One day she clipped its tresses,
And found she had sufficient wool
For fifteen modern dresses.

Maud: “I saw Maisie in the park yesterday.” Helen: “Did you, dear! What was she wearing?” Maud: “I couldn't see, she was reading a magazine.”

Maud: “I saw Maisie in the park yesterday.”
Helen: “Did you, dear! What was she wearing?”
Maud: “I couldn't see, she was reading a magazine.”

* * *