The New Zealand Railways Magazine, Volume 2, Issue 9 (January 1, 1928)
Advertisements in Lighter Vein
Advertisements in Lighter Vein.
Encouraged by the endeavour of the Home railways to brighten their public announcements (says our London correspondent) a writer has come to the rescue with a series of up-to-date railway notices penned in lighter vein. Thus, in place of the time-honoured “Porters meet all trains, and convey travellers' luggage to the hotels free of charge,” the following is suggested:—
Our porters are a genial set,
It would be hard to beat 'em;
At sight of luggage how they sweat,
And trains, they rush to meet 'em.
They charge no fee for handling bags,
They'll take yours with a smile, Sir!
And for a couple, say, of fags,
They'll carry them a mile, Sir!
As warning to the passenger who may be tempted to overload the luggage rack, these lines are submitted:—
The subject of this canto
Is the rack that's overhead;
It deals with your portmanteau,
And your luggage there outspread.
This rack will only hold a ton
When comfortably stored;
So don't pile all your trousseau on,
Unless you're well insured.
Beneath this announcement, the trade advertising department might arrange for the exhibition, at top rates, of some such notice as this: “We insure against all accidents, such as falling trunks. Write to-day for prospectus.—The Elephant Assurance Company.”