Sex

Now pour the vinegar on. The frothy white liquid swells. Federico and Robert watch as it rises over the side of the basin and drips onto the bathroom carpet.

This is excellent news for mankind, says Robert. The frothing continues. Federico wonders about Robert's mother. When will it stop?

Progress never stops.

Robert is training to be an inventor. He told Federico about magnetic South and black holes. Federico told him about sex.

And then the man puts his thing in the lady's hole.

What happens next?

That's all. Apart from a baby.

Robert screwed up his nose. Sounds boring.

Federico agreed; volcanoes were better. But there was something funny about sex. Once he saw one of Sylvia's boyfriends rolling on top of her. The boyfriend made a whining noise, like a cat when it catches a bird. They hear footsteps on the stairs. Robert grabs a towel off the rail and throws it over the carpet. Robert's mother knocks at the door.

What are you boys doing?

We're making a surprise.

The door handle turns.

Mum!

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You're not getting into my hairspray again are you Robert?

No.

Remember what we said about trust.

Yes.

She releases the door handle.

Hairspray is very explosive, Robert whispers.

The best thing about Robert is his ideas, and his sister Hayley. She's older and has John Travolta posters on her wall; she's training to be a Solid Gold dancer. Hayley made Robert hold a wobbly footstool while she kicked high in the air, then star-jumped into a bean bag. She said Federico had to be Danny in Grease. Robert went to get a torch to use as a spotlight and Hayley grabbed Federico. She said, Tell me about it, Stud, and kissed him. She smelt of arrowroot biscuits. He didn't tell Robert.

At dinner, Robert's mother asked each person how their day went. She smiled a lot and said she was very proud of her family's ambition. Mr Rodgers said, Pass the potatoes, Robert. He was training for a marathon. Mrs Rodgers looked at Federico.

What do you want to be when you grow up?

It was something he had been considering. He thought of what Bea always told him.

A genius, he said.