The Pamphlet Collection of Sir Robert Stout: Volume 87
Get Up an' Bar the Door
Get Up an' Bar the Door.
The wind blew cauld frae north to south.
It blew into the door, O,
Says our gudeman to our gude wife,
"Get up and bar the door, O."
"My hand is at my hussy feskep,
1
Gudeman, as ye may see, O;
An' it shouldna be barr'd this hunner
2 year,
It's no be barr'd for me, O."
They made a paction 'tween them twa,
They made it firm and sure, O,
The first that spak' the foremost word
Should rise and bar the door, O.
Then by there cam' twa gentlemen,
At twelve o'clock at nicht, O;
And they could neither see house nor ha',
Nor coal nor candle licht, O.
"Now whether is this a rich man's house,
Or whether is this a pair, O?"
But never a word ane o' them spak',
For the barrin' o' the door, O.
And first they ate the white puddin's,
And then they ate the black, O;
And muckle thought the gude wife to hersel',
But never a word she spak', O.
Then said the tane
3 unto the tither,
4
"Here, man, take ye my knife, O,
Do ye tak' aff the auld man's beard,
And I'll kiss the gudewife, O."
"But there's nae water in the house,
And what shall we do then, O?"
"What ails ye at the puddin' bree,
5
That boils into the pan, O?"
O, up then startit our gudeman,
And an angry man was he, O:
"Wad ye kiss my wife before my face,
And scald me wi' puddin' bree, O?"
Then up start-it our gudewife,
Gied three skips on the floor, O;
"Gudeman, ye've spoken the foremost word,
Get up and bar the door, O."
1 Housewilfory.
2 Hundred.
3 One.
4 Other.
5 Liquor.