Salient. Official Newspaper of the Victoria University Students' Association. Vol 44 No. 9. May 4 1981

Masturbation

Masturbation

Masturbation is one of the least talked about subjects in our society. When it is mentioned it is usually with embarassment, ignorance and shame. Yet masturbation is a common practice and a natural and healthy part of human sexuality.

Although masturbation is no longer said to make you go blind, it is still considered by some to be a transitory stage, a substitute for 'real' sex or a bad habit. The narrow definition of masturbation as a 'second best' channel for high powered sexual urges, has denied its accessibility to some women who have never recognised the need to deal with legitimate sexual response. It has also limited men's perception of their own sexuality by imposing criteria and setting standards for sexual expression.

Because masturbation does not require anyone else's participation but your own, it has often been put down as selfish or self-centred. It is self centred, it also gives feelings of physical pleasure and both of these are seen as wrong by some people in society. Although most people now reject such views they have been responsible for many of the inhibitions individuals have about expressing their sexuality.

Masturbation is a way through which you can learn about your body, what sorts of sexual stimulation you enjoy, what makes you feel good physically, what arouses you and what releases sexual tension. While most men learn or discover orgasms early because of taboos surrounding women's sexuality and genitals women do not always learn what an orgasm is or how to orgasm. If you do not have orgasms yet, masturbation is probably the easiest way to learn. If you do masturbation can be a way to explore your body further.

The knowledge of your body and the confidence you gain through masturbation will probably help sexual communication with your partner if you are in a sexual relationship. However you do not have to be dependant upon another person if you can satisfy yourself. This can free you from the belief that you always have to be in a sexual relationship. It can also remove pressure from a relationship where one person wants more sexual activity than another. Nor need you accept frustration if you do not orgasm with your partner.

Masturbation can be a source of pleasure, comfort, release of tension and a way of giving to yourself. Many women masturbate to relieve period pain. Masturbation does not need to be seen as a substitute for anything but as a pleasurable activity in its own right.

There is no wrong or right way to stimulate yourself, just as there is no wrong or right way to experience an orgasm.. It is important to find the things and areas, the pressures and strokes that arouse you.

Some women prefer direct stimulation of the clitoris, while others find this area too sensitive and prefer pressure on the area surrounding the clitoris. Some women like hard pressure while others prefer a lighter touch. Many women use two or three fingers in a circular motion while others prefer to use one finger in a flicking back and forth motion, still others enjoy stroking the sides of the clitoral shaft up and down. Many women enjoy their fingers inside their vagina while they are stroking their clitoris. Some women masturbate by crossing their legs and exerting steady and rythmic pressure on the whole genital area. Some women use a pillow instead of a hand, a stream of water as in a bath or shower, or a vibrator. There are as many variations as there are individuals

Likewise some men concentrate on the shaft of the penis while others also stroke the testes and around the base of the penis. The amount of pressure used often varies with the sensitivity of the penis as does the speed and, frequency of the strokes. Some men may use their whole hand while others only the fingers of one hand. Other men do not use their hands but instead move their whole pelvic area against a pillow or bed clothes.

Masturbation is a way of expressing your sexuality first with yourself, then with or without someone else. It is not a substitute for sex with another person - just a different form of sexual/sensual expression. Sexual development should continue from birth through to old age. Masturbation can be a very personal way of exploring your sexuality that remains independent of your relationships with other people. Or it can enhance your relationships with them because you know what your body is capable of. It is up to you to make it what you want it to be.