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SMAD. An Organ of Student Opinion. 1936. Volume 7. Number 18.

The Art of Kissing

The Art of Kissing.

"In the Spring a young man's fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love."

Tennyson showed a great understanding of man when he wrote those lines. He did not, however, give any indication of the various forms this love will take; so, as Spring is now here again, "Smad" has scratched on the surface of the subject and obtained the following information, which it now offers for the benefit of the immature students. The Commisionaire was the first person questioned, and from him we found that kissing was the first step in love. Having obtained this base from which to work, we questioned selected students, and have now much pleasure in submitting these opinions on the art of kissing.

B. B.-ll was reluctant to comment at first, but finally summed the matter up as follows:—"Kissing is no sin—but the way some men do it, it's a crime."

M. P-I-h-r was the next girl approached, and she was of the opinion that some men kiss too long—some too little—and most men far too much. For a kiss, to give complete satisfaction should never satify. They should not be taken as food, but as flavouring—a few go a long way.

By a stroke of luck we came across E. I-w-n and A-an W-I-on in the Library and got this firsthand opinion. The value that a girl places on her kisses is always interesting. Some value them too highly—so highly, in fact, that if a man steals one they think they have been assaulted and robbed. This, of course, is only if it happens to be the wrong man. If the man is atractive, then the same circumstance seems beautiful and inevitable."

P-t Ed—rd- thought tthat kisses were not material things, yet some girls seem to dole them out like sweets to greedy little boys. "Others bestow a kiss on a man who has entertained them for an evening in much the same spirit as they would tip a waiter—it's expected of them, and they would not be good fellows if they refrained from doing it."

We stumbled over C-a-lie Pl—k hurrying off to catch the Karori bus, but he just had time to say that "some girls value their kisses so lightly that thhey just throw them away; they are reckless. Others don't give them away, they sell them; these are hard."

J-y-e Cr-tt—den frowned for a moment as one deep in thought, and then said: "Sometimes a girl wonders what lies behind a man's kiss. It may be a way of saying, `Please,' or saying 'Thank you.' But in any case a girl should think before and after she kisses a man, for it is quite impossible to think at the time."

Here was real luck, for R—ger R-b-rt gave us his considered opinion in a few pithy words. "All women yield their lips eventually, but only follish women yield them easily."

B-ll Th-d-y was cornered in the Caf, and he made the startling assertion that some men beg for a kiss—how foolish. They only prove once again that beggars cannot be choosers.

For the real oil we approached T-d Bl-ck-r, and by the prompt answer we received, it looked as though he had given the matter prior thought. "If a man chooses," he said, "he can kiss a girl and she cannot stop him till he has done it, and then it is too late." "Of course," he continued, "such men take a chance of making a girl angry, but a man who never takes a chance often makes a girl wild ... so, what's the odds?"

Our final opinion was from J-n-t G-ai-g-r and D-ck W-Id, who put the matter neatly as follows:—"The man who steals a kiss may not be right, but the man who begs is invariably left."

We hope that these hints prove to be of sufficient value to guide our younger brethren through the troubled period of Spring.

Students... Fool the Examiners! Support the Cafeteria and support yourselves. The Cafeteria will remain open almost to the last day of the examinations. MORNING TEA LUNCH AFTERNOON TEA DINNER or JUST a BITE We recommend the following antidole to examination fever .. LEAVE OFFICE at 4.30 or 5 p.m. ENTER LIBRARY at 4.45 or 5.15 p.m. ENTER CAFETERIA AFTER 1 HOUR'S SWOT Return to library ... very conveniently ON SALE IN THE CAFETERIA: COLLEGE BADGES, PENNANTS, TIES, ENVELOPES NOTE PAPER Etc., CHOCOLATES and CIGARETTES