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The Pamphlet Collection of Sir Robert Stout: Volume 2

Kawau December 10th, 1878

Kawau

As its mighty on convaynient to sind ye tiligrams from this place, not to talk o' the expinse o' long missages, I've tuk the liberty av sindin' ye an ipistol instead. Faix, I've had the divil's own divarshun since I kum here, wid the purty little swarthy darlints that live on the island, an' in me nixt letther I'll let ye into all the saycrits connected wid me love advinchures. Me business now is to tell ye av a little insident which tuk place at Auckland whin I was passin' through. The day afore I left that city a diputashun from the Angle-o-Is-rale Society waited on me, an' axed me to deliver a short addhress afore the mimbers o' their institushin. Afther a little pressin' I consinted, an' that same night I was welkimed be an illigant assimblage, who gave me a rale hearty cead millefailtha. Afther the chairman introduced me to the company, an' the applause which me name avoked had cooled down a bit, I got on me legs, amidst thrimindons cheers, an' delivered the followin'