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Salient. Victoria University Student Newspaper. Vol 35 no. 8. 27 April 1972

sOft velvet

sOft velvet

Item: "sOft velvet" by Rex Halliday. Performed by cast of thousands.

Rex: 'Listen to this one i really mean it. Lots of [unclear: th] will be happening. Don't just look straight ahead. [unclear: I] suppose I had better point out that the idea of [unclear: this] piece is not to create any pretty music.'

He hasn't said who composed this piece. I guess we know. Music Room, Hunter, full. Somebody blows their nose, there ought to be a law. The music [unclear: start] Jenny McLeod clatters away on the drums. [unclear: Gordon] Burt plays a churchy piano. Instantly Sunday, then quickly destroyed with a supermarket ad. Behind [unclear: m] horn blares a morsel of Wagner. A girl giggles. A [unclear: ma] under an umbrella is walking among the audience. [unclear: T] same girl laughs uninhibitedly. And she's not [unclear: even] commissioned. What manner of drumming is this, [unclear: a] from crazy! Clatter bang thank you ma'am. [unclear: Snatch] of demagoguery, electric polemic. Electric [unclear: raucosity] that bass hum intentional? Can't separate the [unclear: inten] and the accidents. Pianist puts on top hat, plays [unclear: so] schmaltzy Chopin. A loud MarselIaise from the [unclear: hon] then it's sung, then the piano joins in. The [unclear: drumme] surveys the audience through binoculars, [unclear: probably] wrong way round. The pianist begins to rave, now Jenny is shouting bullshit. Hell, this is almost as [unclear: go] as the anarchist Bomb Factory! Streaming [unclear: conscious]. The soprano(?) is making some indistinguishably [unclear: lo] noise. The baby wouldn't get a squeal in. But why [unclear: a] they all shouting 'e=mc2'? Now a young lady is [unclear: scre] why, because she's shutting the curtains. What [unclear: for?] they're all singing in phase. 'I love to go a [unclear: wandering] Never mind the brass band, this is the worst stereo [unclear: in] world. Now Jenny is declaiming Portia's speech [unclear: from] pulpit, black robed, a flannel on her head. [unclear: Performence] clapping before and behind. Another fanfare, or [unclear: rath] horn-blast. Now a slow handclap. More [unclear: commerciasl]. This is all simultaneous, five performers, noise and [unclear: a] Rex's introduction heavy under statement, Shouting [unclear: a] soprano blowing soap bubbles. Sanity in the sound [unclear: of] electric guitar. The audience is animated but only [unclear: as] their faces. No human could dance to this music, [unclear: the] rattle for a disembowelled golliwog. Military drum [unclear: b] at one end of the room, pianist ripping off [unclear: Liberace] other. Whispering audience. Jenny blowing up a [unclear: ball] Jenny popping some balloon. Always good for a [unclear: lau] somebody crying 'Consider everything, open up [unclear: you] mind'— Yes! Wrangler advertises a new pair of old [unclear: je] People are pointing. The pariah clattering down [unclear: the] idor is as involved as those within. 'Aaah' sings [unclear: s.]

Rex: 'Right that's it' and it's all over. This chaos, [unclear: I] there was 20 minutes of it, is finished. Chaos has [unclear: giv] birth to a dancing star, wrapped in sOft velvet. The converted audience is too chaotic to clap, but there [unclear: a] jerky hand banging for a while. No more [unclear: appropriat] than between the movements of a symphony.

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