In the first week of the May holidays the V.U.W. Motorcycle club conducted a trip to the South Island. Six bikes went down... five came back. And most of these suffered some kind of damage! The casuality list was;

(i)	For clowning on the trip one bike and its rider was awarded the highest order of speeding tickets (70 m.p.h.), and a small spill on a bridge.
(ii)	Two bikes broke down; both of these were later stopped for speeding by a cop who has apparently given his neighbour a speeding ticket and his wife a parking ticket. One of these bikes also suffered the indignity of receiving a speeding ticket for doing 70 m.p.h. with pillion!
(iii)	One bikie, in a fit of anger, attacked a taxi. He inflicted deep wounds over the door, while completely demolishing his own forks and cracking his engine mounting. He did no other damage to himself, apart from binding his frame!
(iv)	One of the club daredevils was approaching a one-way bridge at 60 m.p.h. when he saw a car coming along the bridge from the opposite direction...
(v)	The Honda 750 displayed in the foyer last week was the only bike not to suffer an injury. Therefore it seems that if you want to travel throughout the South Island without crashing, invest $1,900 in a Honda. 4.