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Salient. Victoria University Student Newspaper. Volume 33, No. 6 6 May 1970

The Mickey Mouse Pansexuality Inquisition

The Mickey Mouse Pansexuality Inquisition


If you agree with the statement, circle T if you disagree, circle F. Return completed forms to the Men's Vice-President.

1. As an infant, I had very few hobbies. T F
2. I have never had a bowel movement. T F
3. Spinach makes me feel isolated. T F
4. When I was a child I used to tease vegetables. T F
5. I would enjoy the work of a chiken-flicker. T F
6. I have an uncontrollable urge to fondle other people's teeth. T F
7. When I look down from a high place I want to spit. T F
8. I use shoe polish to excess. T F
9. When I was a child I was an imaginary playmate. T F
10. I like to stay in the bath until I look like a raisin. T F

Interpretation of scores

Score one point for each statement agreed with.

Score 9-10 Acquiescent; severely adjusted.
Score 6-8 Prescribe cranial diathermy.
Score 3-5 Evidences deep-seated denial of reality; defence mechanisms repressing self-expression; libido super-charged.
Score 1-2 Neurotic; agnostic; stands for the Queen.
Score 0 Can he read?

(Adapted from Nexus)