Dear Jim

Sir-Dear Jim, I love you. When I was at primary school we used to have the odd pimp. You know what we used to do with them? String them to a wall and flick them with rubber-bands. Dear Jim, rumour has it that you are a pimp. What should we do with you? Perhaps a little playful vengence wouldn't go amiss. If it's one at primary school, why shouldn't we do it here at our noble institution. If they do it in Chicago and Vietnam, why shouldn't we do it here? Yet isn't this a very primitive, basic, perhaps animal reaction? However, in Vietnam they don't use rubber bands, either side, and yet dear Jim, rumour has it that you hold Vietnam as a show-case of dedicated Western attempts at justifying basic human motivations. Perhaps you could understand why I love you so, for I too am a primitive being.