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The Return of The Triboldies

Part 21

Cagliostro has read Ocarina's journal, and is most perturbed at its inaccuracies. He thinks that a certain notorious episode in Ocarina's childhood explains the latter's capacity as a fluent liar.

When Cagliostro and Ocarina were both children, they used to amuse themselves by running in and out in holes in the rock at Coldplacc. Once while they were doing this Cagliostro found Ocarina dropping camel droppings into a huge vat where cucumber juice was being fermented. Cagliostro, being stronger than Ocarina (and living longer, we see) forced him to drink some of the poisoned juice. The green contained in the juice and the brown in the dung combined to produce Vorops, which is the substance of untruth according to the theory of the famous ancient philosopher Tri-chinopoly.

A magnificent piece of deduction: the cause of Ocarina's anomaly is explained, and Trichinopoly's theory is proved. I shall have to look more closely at the Suggestions of Trichinopoly.

In the Suggestions there is what may be a reference to the Capsule of Enur. I have found a very difficult passage to interpret, but suggests that it lies buried under the centre of Netragrednik, Cagliostro thinks my interpretation is sound; tomorrow we shall find the capsule.

Already we have tried in a dozen different ways to find the centre. We have dug 12 holes, some only a short distance from each other. There has been no capsule.

Trichinopoly would not lie! And Nostradamus too agress with my interpretation. I shall ask Ottoman's opinion.

It is thai we have been looking for the centre in the wrong place. How, asks Otto, can the centre of a place be within that place? He is right, of course; the centre of Netragrcdnik. according to one of Pandemonium's principles, must be far above the ground in Gnisu.

Tomorrow we shall look above our heads in the city of grey faces: throughout the entire night we have been arguing with Cagliostro and Nostradamus and Ottoman about the best way of finding the centre, and searching through the ancient literature for interpretations of an outside centre. At last, at noon today, when we were to be in Gnisu, we found this diagram in the Lesser Meditations-the points I have marked + and 7 and / obviously represent the three gates of Netragrednik seen in a mirror: + is the southeast gate, 7 the north gate, and / the southwest. O is the flat position of the centre of our homeland. To find O we must have long strings woven, two stretching from + to 7 (one secured and + and loose at 7 and vice versa), and the other two likewise, between 7 and /. Thus, to find -, somebody at + must take the string that is loose at + and secure at 7, and, keeping the string taut, ride into Gnisu. Somebody else at 7 must take the siring loose there and ride into Gnisu, keeping the string taut. Where the two bodies meet is -. When two strings (as before) are stretched between 7 and -, = may be found; and, by like methods and using ten strings, we shall find Z. Those who were with me at first were dubious about the interpretation I have just given; but in a few hours I convinced them that Pandemonium was right. If we make two very long strings, we shall be able to use them again and again. Forty among us are hard at work, weaving.

Six days after we were to have begun our search, the strings are completed. They are of six strands (4 green, 2 red) and are in large rolls. We shall have to use wagons to unwind

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brought my prisoners (mine because nobody else has claimed them), and may release (hem if Ihey behave well; I can think of nothing to use them for, and they are very noisy in my cave. Why is Ottoman so long in arriving with Velocipede's wagon? ... At last, here he is. The strings became entangled when the two wagon? met. and knots had to be exchanged. This siring is much too long; only half of it has been used. Ottoman has driven himself to this gate and

fixed the siring to the wagon so (hat no more can be uncoiled. Now we shall go into Gniso, where, as usual, no people arc to be seen, though we know they are there, watching us through (he holes in their walls. Perhaps They are afraid of us and (not without justification) think we are madmen There is no reason why Ottoman should not leave immediately. He has starled. He has stopped; he can go no further because (he string has been caught by a building.

Now we have put a pole on Veloce's wagon, and the string is pulled from the top. After three days of painful struggle, we have reached the other siring. Cagliosiro's.

We seek Caglioslro. not his string, but these details do not matter. This is point -. I am taking my piece of chalk and making a mark. It is a more populous quarter of Gnisu. A few dozen natives stare at us as if we were a travelling circus, What impertinence! Sometimes we doubt Ocarina's advice, not to disturb the Gnisu men. and would like to spit from a distance into their ears.

The mark is made and the stake driven. Now we must find Cagliostro so that he can loosen his string, lay it beside this one, and fasten it to this stake.

After weeks of hauling string, we are at last on our way to O. Now I am with Caglioslro, waiting for Olio to arrive. Where can he be? Already we have waited here two days.

By now I have learned my prisoners' Gnisu language. I have spent most of today lecturing Ihcm on the folly of civilisalion and ihe necessity of chaos. Once. I told them, our people had craftsmanship far superior to your own. Our illustrious forefathers had devices that would move themselves, and devices thai would think and talk. But these devices were making our ancienls useless and lazy, and replaced all the functions of man. When the enemy attact the ancients, the

devices thought that the enemy would conquer, and joined the enemy. But some of the ancients studied magic; by no sensible means they did something to the devices and lied to Coldplace to reflect, closely pursued by the enemy. Beware! I told (hem. Eschew this institutionalism that your people are tending to! Tell them so! And, unable to think of more advice, I let them go free. If we ever want more prisoners, it will not be hard to collect them... Still no sign of Toman.

Perhaps he has already passed our string, somewhere behind us; I'll lake my wagon back and have a look.

I have found O. Cagliosiro's string crosses Otto's in the same square where we found the gianl shellfish; O must be the spot on the pillar that Haranguertang (in an exuberant moment) took from here and planted in our upper clearing. This discovery leads me to an alarming though: If the centre of Netragrednik is within Netragrednik. then Netragrednik cannot be Netragrednik! Bui if I find the capsule of Enur buried below where the pillar was pulled out. there is nolhing to worry about.

We have been digging deep, surrounded by a crowd of glum Gnisu people. It is obvious that they have taken the capsule of Enur while we were blinking. And, not knowing what use to make of it, have probably thrown it away. We shall have to look elsewhere.