Other formats

    Adobe Portable Document Format file (facsimile images)   TEI XML file   ePub eBook file  

Connect

    mail icontwitter iconBlogspot iconrss icon

Salient. An Organ of Student Opinion at Victoria College, Wellington, N.Z. Vol. 20, No. 7. 30th May, 1957

"Marxist Leninists Song"

"Marxist Leninists Song"

I am the very model of a modern Marxist-Leninist,
I'm anti-war and anti-God and very anti-feminist;
My thinking's dialectical, my wisdom's undebatable,
When I negate negations they're undoubtedly negatable.
And yet I m no ascetic—I am always full of bonhomie
When lecturing to classes on political economy;
And comrades all agree that they have never heard a smarter cuss
Explain the basic reasons for the slave revolt of Spartacus.

Chorus : Explain the basic, etc.

I'm fierce and unrelenting when I'm extirpating heresies
Yet patient and forgiving to the comrade who his error sees;
In short, as propagandist, agitator, and polemicist
I am the very model of a modern Marxist-Leninist.

Chorus : In short, as propagandist, agitator, and polemicist, He is the very etc.

My love of Party history comes very close to mania,
I teem with information on the Bund in Lithuania,
My speech on the Decembrists is replete with fun and pleasantry,
I know the different stages collectivizing peasantry
With Russian Social Democrats I'm always glad to clench a fist,
(While carefully distinguishing the Bolshevist and Menshevist);
But when I am confronted with a regular Bukarinite
I get a rise in temperature (both Centigrade and Fahrenheit).

Chorus : He gets a rise etc.

I know what Lenin said about the concept of the deity,
And why it's a very dangerous to worship spontaneity;
In short as propagandist, agitator, and polemicist.
I am the very model of a modern Marxist-Leninist.

Chorus : In short as propagandist, agitator, and polemicist He is the very etc.

In fact, when I begin to try to fight against bureaucracy,
To criticize myself a bit, and practise more democracy;
When bringing Marx's teachings up to date I'm much more wary at,
And when I've done with phrases like "impoverised proletariat";
When I have learned that workers think that nothing could be sillier
Than "monolithic unity" and biased Russophiliq
Then people will exclaim: "Hurrah! He's not a stupid sap at all
A better Marxist-Lininist has never studied 'Capital'!"

Chorus: A better, etc.

My policies and theories have an air of unreality
Because I am a victim of the cult of personality;
But still, as propagandist, agitator, and polemicist
I am the very model of a modern Marxist-Leninist.

Chorus : But still, as propagandist, agitator, and polemicist He is the very etc.

—From "The Rhyming Reasoner—a Journal of Indiscretion", March, 1957. Rumoured to be from the pen of a V.U.C. alumnus once famous for his Extravs.