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Salient. An Organ of Student Opinion at Victoria College, Wellington N.Z. Vol. 11, No. 1. February 27, 1948

Debating Society — Wit and Slips on Friday Nights

page 11

Debating Society

Wit and Slips on Friday Nights

Salient has during the past years been lightened by reports of the witticisms and faux pas which regularly emerge from VUC debates. As it is impossible to give a resume of the multifarious activities of that lively University Society, we present for your delight a few keys to unlock the door of memory of those enjoyable Friday nights.

1943: I admit I'm a bit of a sceptic about Russia. Blessed are the meek, but there's only one blessed Meek about this show.

1941: Government of the People, by the Chambers of Commerce, for the Associated Banks.—J. W. Winchester on the Doidges and Harkers.

1944: "Does Salient stink? Well, the editor works very hard." Thus spake John Ziman on the topic of the day, August, 1944. Mr Campion said that Salient was run by a mysterious Red Octopus with long tentacles. This was proved by the pink scribbling pads in Salient room. And Mr. Mabbett suggested that Salient represented only the opinions of a few Communists, Catholics, Christians and other cranks. "The cafeteria used to give you indigestion, but Salient fixed all that."—Mr; Hartley: and Mr. O'Flynn in reply to an interjector: "I can't hear you and I don't think I should try."

The present foreign policy of the Soviet Union is a menace to world peace. April, 1946—Lost.

Mr. MacCreary: "That strange monster, the Soviet Ambassador's car. . . . What country seeking war would sink its resources in such a phenomenon?"

Mr. Winchester: "Some of the speakers seem to be in a state of nervous pregnancy."

That the present policy of U.S.A. is one of imperialist expansion. May, 1946—Carried.

Mr. Solomon: "Insidious campaign to make NZ the 49th State . . . monopoly of the taxicab service . . . concatinistic continuity."

Mr. Ron Smith: "A little pressure from the White House,' and they get no more tooth-paste." (Int.: "Squeeze 'em.")

Mr. Lovell: "I Just got up to correct a few facts. I read 'Harper's' and the 'Readers' Digest.'

That the B.M.A. is hampering the progress of medical services in N.Z. May, 1946—Carried.

Mr. Chorlton made three points only. One or them concerned the subject of the debate. "The B.M.A. should run the Government like all the other unions."

That the British proposals for India are in the best interests of Indian people. July, 1946. Boat.

Ben. O'Connor: If these proposals don't mean freedom for the Indian people then I'll join the Communist Party! (Cheers). "I've got an application form here," Jim W. was seen to get a fountain pen from his pocket in preparation.

Mr. Hickey (seconding O'Connor): "Chairman, Ladies and Gentlemen, and Communists"—The people of India will decide for themselves under the new constitution. In India you have plagues, floods ('and the English for 200 years'). The English must get out quickly."

Impromptu Debates

3. That red bluegums should be planted to further the White Australia Policy.

Mr: McCreary's speech was a Rhapsody in Blue and just about every other colour of the rainbow. Claiming that red bluegums were sticky, and barking up the wrong tree was a bad thing, he decided to leaf it alone and not go through the awful messy business again. Cries of "eucalyptus you."

The motion was carried.

6. That an Executive, grant should be made to provide liquor in the Gym.

Mr. O'Flynn was in reminiscent mood and told an amusing story of the days when men with torches prowled round the Gym, to surprise unwary tipplers. A student dashing round the Gym. with a bottle of beer under each arm. a man with a torch in hot pursuit, and a well-known member of the Professorial Board running third.

10. That familiarity breeds.

Mr. Cohen went from breeding to begetting and likened the smouldering fire in the heart of the male to a compost heap. He simply couldn't conceive what this smouldering fire led to. Mrs. Cohen from the audience: "You ought to know."

Debaters Please Note

Do not think of knocking out another person's brains because he differs in opinion from you; it would be as rational to knock yourself on the head because you differ from yourself ten years ago.

March 14 1945.

Extra V. 1946

Extra V. 1946

Peter Pansy Emerges

he amplified his initial remarks, in no uncertain terms. ... It would be absurd to suggest that ... all dancers are sinners, but we cannot take the risk or the responsibility of providing opportunity which leads to promiscuity. . Nothing can Justify jitter bugglng in which girls are upturned to show their panties."

Pending further action all dancers are to adhere to these rules. Girls to provide themselves with the following articles: (a) One suit of mail armour; (b) one padlock, key to be swallowed; (c) slacks only for jitter-buggers.

Men.—All hip pockets to be removed; the following are forbidden: Skeleton keys; emetics, laxatives, tin openers and oxyacetylene flames. Women must wear helmets with visors, men will wear moustaches— the cemetery is to be picketed and flood lit. All dancing will be under supervision. Any man whose passions are raised or any woman who suspects that her sanctity is being lowered, will immediately contact a responsible member of the social committee who will provide the necessary precautions.

(P.6. No. 4, 1945.)