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Salient. An Organ of Student Opinion at Victoria College Wellington, N.Z. Vol. 4, No. 7 July 2, 1941

"Tally-Ho!" Himsei

"Tally-Ho!" Himsei

Men and women! A thing has come to pass that will shake still further the rotten foundations of our debased society. Fascism, has been brought yet closer to the college by the action of an irresponsible bourgeoisie. The sacred liberties of the student commune have been whittled down to almost nothing. The time has come now when we, the poor in mind, must shake off the shackles that weigh us down into the mud whence we came. We must rise and throw off the yoke in one glorious revolution; "Salient" has become compulsory! Do you, O Comrades dear, realise the significance of that? From now on you will be forced to shape your mind from the blather that you read in its reactionary columns. Consider it! Take the last copy of "Salient" and analyse it! Ponder over it and you will be convulsed with horror.

Wake Up, New Zealand! And what do you find when you have woken up? An article pinched from a rival paper. But does it merit a front page? Well, perhaps it does, because there are many people among us who think as Major Murchison does. As a matter of fact, it seems rather typical. To be quite frank, we might, if we were not above that, draw a moral from it. A good article, I'm afraid, but dammit, I'll soon find something to show up the nefarious doings of the bloated oppressor.

Ballotomania. Aha, Mr. Capitalist, we have found you out. It sounds sane, but how could it be, coming from such a polluted source? Don't allow yourselves to be bamboozled, comrades, by such subterfuge as the ballot box. Realise that the freedom that it ensures to you means nothing to me. After all, boys, I wouldn't mind getting in on the ground floor of a little dictatorship of the masses. Therefore take up

Arms and the Man that might be hidden in your soul, sorry, irrational body, will carry me to victory. Poor, don't you think? I mean the report of the play reading. Still, I suppose that the editor had to "fill up the space somehow. But one day we shall no longer be duped by such devices. We shall raise me to the top, and amidst your deep-throated bellows of

Victoria I shall arrive and the first thing I shall do is to purge the paper of this painful tapeworm, it has had its day and it is very very boring. Arrowroot, I understand, will make it disappear into

No Man's Land. Necessary, but needs brightening up. Leave it out, Mr. Editor, when there is nothing worth while to put there:

Silhouettes of a departed ghost are rather insubstantial. Snap into it, swing it, M, you are out of date M. The [unclear: Spteat] thing is to be quite transsubstantial like my love lyrics of a deaf mute.

Drawing made up of dashes and circles

That beats you, what! If you could write like that you might be locked up

For Life too. (I did give myself away now, hut you gueased as much. Or did you?). Necessary again, but why make it so long? Another apace filler. I haven't finished yet, comrades. (I remembered my cue just now). So let's look further at

Things to Come. No comment, I am wiser than H. G. Wells there, even though I indulge in

Pre-War Liberties. That rather stumped me, I'm afraid, so let's be nice to the reporter. A blow for the revolution, comrade, keep it up, and don't take up any

New Writing. Is this our cultural uplift? If so, it is time that something were done about it. The uplift is easier to acquire, though some don't take the hint. Having heard all about the expensive upkeep of the Stud. Ass., what with bouquets and empty tins, I'm not surprised that the editor selected a bob book. You might find something more worth while reviewing and do it rather more originally and independently. If you need guidance, ask Confucius, and if he is too tight, go to

Dr. T. Z. Koo. Part of this article, very interesting. The rest just too too sweet. The weaker sex's touch, I presume. Let a he man go along next time, a true representative of

The Pacific Peoples. I know you want to get good marks, Mr. Reporter, but why just give a summary? Was the lecture really worth while? Did Ernie give us a talk on the Pacific peoples, as he promised us, or did he give us a primer on anthropology? Shouldn't he of the erotic gent's neckwear have put some more pep into his lecture? Don't toady, my downtrodden comrade. Be more class conscious. Even if it is the mighty Ernest shoot him if he deserves it. Let there be fireworks and

Blue Lights. Don't mince matters. Yes, not at all bad. Good idea, well done, comrade. Be a

Sport and go on like that, even though I have woken up now and shall stop. I am an ardent revolutionary, but I do know when discretion is the better part of valour. The huskies on that page might do me actual [unclear: bodly] harm, so good-night, boys and girls, I beg your pardon; men and women.

"Tally [unclear: ha]."