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The Kia ora coo-ee : the magazine for the ANZACS in the Middle East, 1918

After the Operation

After the Operation.

"Who am Ish?"

''You're Jones. You've just had an operation."

"I know yoush. You're Sisther Holt. You're very capable womansh."

"Yes. Now lie down."

"Alrigsh. Gimme kish, Mary."

"I'm not Mary."

"Yesh're. You're my wife. Gimme hand. I want hold handsh."

"Anything for a peaceful life! But he's making violent love to me... Now keep your head down, old chap."

"Allri'." (Shouting). "Keep headsh down, lads... Jacko's aeroplanesh!"

* * *

"What'sh matter me?"

"You'll be all right now. No trouble with that wound any more."

"Nobody knowsh whatsh matter me."


"Tell you secretsh. I've swallowed Turkish

shell. That shell had Kaiser insidesh."

"Yes lie down."

"Everybodysh very miserable here. I'm cheeringsh everybody up. Sing songsh you: 'I've got a motto, always merry and bright,' etc., etc."

* * *

"Whatsh's basin for?"

"In case you are sick."

"Don't want be sick."

"Don't move your head up, old fellow."

"All right. Whatsh in cylinder?"

"Something to do you good."

"It's oxygen. I know oxygen. I'm getting

all right now."

"Yes, you're getting on splendidly now."

"Allrightsh now. Going recite poem: 'All the merry birds seem to say, my David's 21 to-day.' Good-ni."


* * *

"Where's old Clancy?"

"You're wanted... Clancy."

"Hullo Sergeant!"

"Hullo, Clancy. Sydney blokes no good. Melbourne chaps best fighters in world."

"That's right, Sergeant."

"Everybody agreesh with me to-day. Shows good sense."

Voice from distance: "He knows what I think of his crowd when he's all right. Wash-outs, that's what they are!"

"Jacka, Victorian chap. All brave men Victorians."

"So they are,,old fellow. Now lie down quietly.',

"You're Mary, aren't you?',

"No. Don't you recognize me?"

"Yes. Your name's Doris. Saw it in your autograpsh book."

"That's right. Do you want some water? You mustn't drink it: only wash your mouth out."

"Where's Sister Holt?"

"Here I am, laddie."

"You're always here. Had your dinnersh?"

"Bless the man, it's bed time.

* * *

"You did frighten me. What's the time?"

"Seven o'clock. How are you this morning?"

"Feeling all right now again."

"Much pain?"

"No......Is my operation to day?"

"Bless your soul, no! You don't want another, do you?"

"I am glad. I thought it was to-day.