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The Plutocrats [1937]

Song. — Charon

Song.

Charon.

Down in Hawaii Etc.

(The Devil's Own led by Mrs Beer enter right, dressed if possible as Hula sancers. As Charon Instructs Daisy how to dance, they also dance gracefully at the back following the words of the song with their own actions.)

Chorus.

Dance to the soft delightful cadence
Of melodious guitars. (They dance)

Charon.

Emulate them, darling Daisy!
Dance to the melody of guitars!

(Daisy under the tuition of Charon commences to dance clumsily)

You should find it very easy
Sway your hips in manner lazy.

(Daisy does so, though her manner could not be described as lazy)

Charon.

Oh waggle your behind with gracious ease!
Strike and attitude nice and stately,
Do not wobble so at the knees
Stand erect and bow sedately.

(Daisy follows instructions.)

Charon.

Now with a sinuous twest bend over,
Gently sway with seductive grace,
Dance as lightly as Pavlova
A smile of contentment on your face.

(Daisy & The Devil's Own do so.)

Chorus

Dance as lightly as Pavlova
A smile of contentment on your face.

Charon.

Shyly blushing, coyly glancing,
Glide impressively Daisy dear. (She does so)
Hula dancing's so entrancing
Letter by far than modern prancing.

Chorus.

Hula dancing's so entrancing
Better by far than modern prancing.

page break Mr. Nemesis.

I simpl had to come back, Messy, I could't stand watching Dulce Domum go to the park like thus. And when the fascist emissary come to me this morning.....

Messalina.

(Dreamily) He was such a nice man, that Fascist,

Mr. Nemesis.

(Meaningly) Yes. When they offered me the dictatorship, I couldn't refuse. Do you know what I heard? (Lowering his voice) That the Plutocrats had been making eves at the ladies of the harem!

Messalina.

(Shocked) But how horrible!

Mr. Nemesis.

Something had to be done about it. (Suddenly struck by an idea) I've got it! [unclear: I'll] weave a spell and make them all virtuous!

Messalina.

(Doubtfully) That'd be an awfully difficult spell

Mr. Nemesis.

May be, but I'll try.

(He steps forward and waves his arms mysteriously)

Messalina.

(Hastily) Here wait a minute, I trust I'm not included in this puritanical spell?

Mr. Nemesis.

Of course not! Now, watch the little dickie-bird. (He waves his arms again. Cymbals clash violently Messalina jumps.) That's all. (Pause) [unclear: afraid] my disguise isn't very becoming.

Messalina.

(Doing him up) It'll be coming off if you don't look out. (Looking off) Good Lord, look at this!

(Enter the Plutocrats. Jerkily and in perfect time, in an aes thetic manner, a la Bunthorne, they each carry a large lily at which they gaze with looks of profound adoration.)