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Vat 59. May 18-June 1, 1959

Education

Education

The modern Playway education system was treated to an airing yesterday, when model Plai Wai School was put on show for parents. Law fugitive David (Susie Fixation) Brown stumbled into classroom and was disguised by kids. Tots trotted out pat answers to large range of difficult questions—were then allowed out for morning recess (only an hour and a half because "Mr. Nash was coming to present prizes at the school break-up).

After carefree playtime, kiddies and parents assembled to hear Board of Governor' Chairman, P.T.Y. (Detective Extraordinary) Holmes. After school song.

Playway Song

Playway's the modern kind of teaching that a modern child enjoys;
Instead of learning mathematics we can play around with toys.
Playway's a fine education
Every kid loves it.
We say with no hesitation
We're gonna be the flower of the nation.
Playway says teacher ought to treat a kid exactly like a pal,
What's more, he's got to know that every one's an individual,
Deep down we want to be trusted—
We won't abuse it
If we do, don't be disgusted,
At least you know we'll be well adjusted.
Playways the most important privilege that any kiddy has
Keep us from spelling and arithmetic and any of that jazz.
Keep us from spelling
Keep us from arithmetic
Keep us from that jazz
'Cause Playway's all we has.

Holmes presented annual report of Plai Wai Board and parents were assailed with hard facts re school's scholastic, sporting and cultural achievements. Further evidence of year's work was shown with school concert wherein pupils entertained assembly with ballet and song.

During concert Dave (Gin Grafter) Brown tried to make a break, was spotted by Walter (Hawk-Eye) Nash and held, pending arrival of uniformed police. A spot of fast talking enabled Brown family to give authority the slip.

page 12

Walter's in the Lurch

Young Brown has gone and done the dirty,
The way he treats me, really it's a crime.
I shiver and quiver
Sold down the river
Walter's in the lurch this time.

He's been and gone and pulled a fast one
I'm P.M. but I can't say I'm in me prime
The simple fact is
He's in the cactus
Walter's in the lurch this time.

Don't tell the country
He's in a mess
I'm up a gum tree
Sound the S.O.S.

My head beats against a vicious circle
From the ridiculous to the sublime
Fetch a tranquilliser
I'm in the fertiliser
Really in the lurch
Yes he's in the lurch
Poor Old Walter's in the lurch this time.