Song

Hullo, there, everyone,
God bless everyone
Listening-in this day.
For I have something sad to say—
Something that concerns
Everyone who earns
Five-and-six a day:
For our salvation, let us pray.
We all must be prepared to make a sacrifice . . .
Try these almond fingers, sir,
They're awfully nice.
Prayer and fasting
Cause a lasting
Ennoblement of mind:
That's why our unemployed are so refined:

Chorus.
I have an idea, so queer,
That soon you'll be dieting,
(It's better than rioting
When you're down aud out)
You'll have to live low, heigh-ho!
And taste the felicity
Of Spartan simplicity . . .
It's the only taste you'll know!
You'll find it hard to live on water
Like aspidistras do . . .
And it's hard to get a spark up on H2O.

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But don't get depressed,
The rest
Will liven your tissues,
So don't mind the issues . . .
Ho-heigh, just live for to-day!

I hope that my discourse
Won't distress or cause
Any loss of sleep . . .
I hate to see shareholders weep.
For in me you see,
A man of sympathy.