page 25

Current Events.

Our profs. are most zealous reformers,
And wish to abolish all cram,
Exams, are offences enormous,
The Senate a horrible sham.
As yet they have not quite succeeded
In getting their own little way;
Reform is most urgently needed,
But the Chancellor must have his say.

Chorus:
It will all come right in the future,
A Chancellor new we shall get.
Then the profs, in their glee,
Will our "ploughing" decree,
Oh, thank heaven, that's not just yet.

The Motherland's greatly excited,
Because of the sweet suffragette,
Who wants to blow up poor benighted
Old Asquith and his Cabinet.
We all love her methods most dearly,
Revolvers and bombs she will use
To show you so gently, yet clearly,
The justice and force of her views.

Chorus:
It will all come right in the future,
For the "soft" sex will then mean the men,
When la femme rules the roost,
You will have to get used,
To her coming home after ten.

At Easter a Carnival splendid
Was held in our city so gay,
Alas ! what is "broke" can't be mended,
So now there's the devil to pay.
For just how to spend all the money
Is puzzling the Council a lot;
John Crewes wants to buy the bears honey,
The other proposals are rot.^*

Chorus:
It will all come right in the future,
Though at present we cannot say when,
If all get their dues,
It's "Good-bye, Mr. Crewes,"
You will have to begin again.

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There's a building (?) we call Lambton Station,
Where trains can come in by the score^†
It's an object of much admiration,
And measures quite twenty by four.
But Massey has promised us lately,
He'll steadily keep it in view,
He'll build us one splendid and stately
Of white stone from far Oamaru.

Chorus:
It will all come right in the future,
The Government blandly declares,
A station we'll get—
Though, of course not just yet,
But perhaps in a hundred years.