Criminal Reminiscences.

Air: "Months and Months."

William Psyches—

Since childhood's days I've always walked in ways considered dark,
I once got spanked for bigamy, and thought it quite a lark;
One day an interfering copper twigged me shoot a wife,
The Beak believed the blighter, and I landed here for life;
I'd shot at her often enough before—I only pinked her once—
No, I don't suppose I'll do it again for months, and months, and months.

"Being good is an awfully lonesome job."

Dr. Findlay—

Since childhood's days I've always been a prima facie saint,
My darkest deeds I've e'er contrived of lighter line to paint;
My great imperialistic schemes set Joseph all agog:
He waded in, got badly left, while I withdrew incog.
He tried to put old England right, he only did it once,
And I don't suppose he'll do it again for months, and months, and months.

"Matri-money is the root of all evil."

When Bertie took his maiden trip a year or two ago,
We realised the danger, but poor Bertie did not know;
And now he's lost all sense of shame, and as the story goes,
He's writing to the papers on the way we should propose;
We've all of us done it ourselves before, and some of us more than once,
But I don't suppose he'll do it again for months, and months, and months.

"Fine speeches are the instruments of knaves."

When good Sir Bob got up to speak on our last Capping Day,
We listened for a little while, and then we went away;
But now he's taking joyful steps towards the happy goal,
And planning little schemes of professorial control;
We used to do it a lot before, and we'll admit at once,
We don't suppose we'll do it again for months, and months, and months.