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Sport 32: Summer 2004
Behaving Badly in Rotorua
Behaving Badly in Rotorua
Jonathan and Riki manage to get themselves thrown out of a bar in Rotorua, which one would imagine was nearly impossible. Riki's slightly garbled version of this turns around one of Jonathan's elaborate metaphors. Imagine there's this island, and there's four people on it, and all of them are deaf…
The proprietor, according to him—the proprietor's loser son, according to them—listens to the tale of the island and the four deaf page 122 people in bemused silence. Finally he says, ‘That's the biggest load of New Age shit I've ever heard.’
‘You've really offended me, man,’ Jonathan says, with dignity.
And then—surely there's a step missing somewhere here?—Riki and Jonathan get thrown out.
Or: the radio interview in Rotorua, when, exasperated beyond bearing by being asked yet again what it is they do when they are not making music—being infuriated by the repeated unspoken question, Yes, but what do you really do?—Jonathan drawls, on air, ‘Well, I masturbate a lot.’
Or: driving around Rotorua in the van, drumming up business for the gig that night out the loudhailer on the roof, when Brian de Grane makes an unscheduled appearance. Bring your daughters down to the yard; we'll have them working in the office, and doing a bit of part-time modelling on the side. How this brings potential audience members to a show is unclear; it just has everyone in the van helpless with laughter.