Title: Tourism

Author: Bernard Cohen

In: Sport 5: Spring 1990

Publication details: 1990, Wellington

Part of: Sport

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Sport 5: Spring 1990



This is a different city from that which we had been led to believe existed. The people are different. They have different habits, schedules, imperatives. Their dialect differs from that of our own. For one thing, they dress differently; their skin tends to differ. The streetlamps here are more orange than ours. The cars are slightly longer and less rusty on average. Also: older. The number-plates reflect the city's personality. They are more practised in their small-talk, more interesting. There are more bald men, probably because of a shortage of hair-restorants.

The principal mode of transport in Melbourne is agricultural machinery. Here, this is permitted on the freeways. It is authorised to proceed. If it were not, everything would come to a stop. The roads are interminable.