Rebecca Nash

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Raised Nubs

looking down
to a patch of road-marked tarmac
we watch balcony rungs
make shadows
more gaping than geometric

you firm your thumbs
through my belt loops
tug absently

for only forty minutes ago
we were fucking
partly magnetised
mostly bored

though in the meat of it all
we thought in unison
again
again
again

*

the sky is packing in
I can see clouded dullness
on your back
can feel it on mine

road shadows blur
further into road
and under it
we are pressed
together slowly

we roll and smoke
roll and smoke

*

at dawn
I walk to work
along marked lines

my hands force dough warm
tuck seams under
leave each bun
trembling roundly
as its neighbour

rising
white
elastic
buttons

and ginger-wine
black clove specks
thin flashes of lemon
soak currants
for tucking into pastry

buns and eccles
gloss under oven heat
smooth bread tops
split open
milk and sugar glazes
crackle on pastry
hot currant juice runs
and stains

my hands shake
as I sit on the toilet
feeling at my rawness
the last bit of your heat

all morning
I have been giving
and now my body is cold

*

we will take to the balcony rungs
take it all down
because three-dimensionality
has become unnerving

better to be flat like tarmac
to project our bodies
onto blank walls

today I lose a finger
tomorrow I will lose an eye
in atomistic squall

I can see you standing
in uncut grass
mouth cracked open
into a sharp-toothed smile
and then your lips disappear

you are climbing ladder spindles
you are climbing
until there is no ladder
you rise in fuzz
in soundlessness

and I roll and smoke
but it comes out in clouds
from my chest middle
I breathe in fuzz
in soundlessness

we will run our fingers
over the flatness
look for a raised nub
of screw on wood
look for some small trickle
of the third dimension

___________
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